Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is argued that in some countries, it might be challenging for the people over the age of 50 to get better jobs, despite their experience. In this essay, I will discuss the causes of this problem and suggest the solution.

To begin with, senior citizens are very respectable for a country. However, a bitter fact about our society is age discrimination. Employers prefer younger workers, because they are perceived to be more energetic and adaptable. In addition, younger employees may be more willing for long hours working with less higher salary expectations. In contrary, high experienced people requires higher salaries, which is also a reason for over aged people to not get hired by the employers. Another reason is advancement in technology, modern workplaces require better digital skills. Some aged people may not have enough skills of today technology and their experience is considered outdated.

Moreover, there are some solutions for this problem. The first one is, government should provide training to the retirees for providing them with good digital skills. By doing this, aged people may also consider competitive in the job market. Furthermore, government should promulgate the law against the discrimination of age, so the employers should hire people on the base of their skills and experiences rather then their age. In addition, companies should provide flexible working hours to employees, so they can work without any stress and with proper focus.

In conclusion, despite the age of people, I believe good employment opportunities are the basic right of every citizen regardless of their age.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both causes, such as age discrimination and technological changes, and solutions, including government training programs and anti-discrimination laws. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. For instance, the point regarding flexible working hours is introduced somewhat abruptly in the third paragraph without a clear, direct connection to solving the employment challenges of older workers. The position is clear throughout, and relevant examples and ideas are presented, though a tendency to over-generalise keeps the development at a moderate level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression from introduction to causes, solutions, and conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct thematic areas, such as moving from the problems to the measures taken. Cohesive devices are employed to link ideas, such as "To begin with," "In addition," and "Moreover," although some referencing and transitional links can feel a bit mechanical or repetitive. Overall, the structure guides the reader adequately through the arguments, fulfilling the criteria for a clear progression throughout the text.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The vocabulary used provides an adequate range for the task, attempting less common items such as "promulgate," "age discrimination," and "retirees." However, there are notable word choice and collocation errors that prevent a higher score, such as "less higher salary expectations," "high experienced people," "over aged people," and "on the base of." Despite these inaccuracies, communication is not impeded, and the range of vocabulary remains sufficient to convey the intended meaning successfully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating structures like conditional and relative clauses. There are some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, such as "the people over the age of 50," "suggest the solution" instead of plural solutions, and prepositions inside patterns like "against the discrimination of age" instead of against age discrimination. Punctuation and verb agreements also show occasional lapses, such as "requires higher salaries" following a plural subject. However, these errors rarely impede communication and the majority of sentences remain understandable.

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