Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It has been observed that a good job is very important to spend money our daily expensives. Some people think that after the age of over 50 less chance to get good opportunities.It is a magor problem in these days. I find the given notion logically sound. My view points regarding the statement greater extant. I will highlight these point in the subsequent paragraph, which will lead to a logical conclusion.

To commance with, older people should update themselves day to day. To elaborate it, Some individuals do not like to restart study after finishing their qulifaction and do not try to use modern tachqunice. If they will have good knowledge they will get best job opportunities. For instance, a survey was conduced by 'The World Organisation' in 2023 and revealed that 70% employer update themsalves while attending the saminars.

The second reason to proves my point is that age is not matter if person has better qualities and good experience. To explan it, human age just number if poeple should have experience than they will have more opptions in their life to do something new and better. A headline was published by 'Bussniess Global' in 2024 and showed that most of the successful persons achive their goal in the age of over 50.

To conclude the discussion, it can be said despite the fact that government organised the saminar for people which develop the skills of senior worker so that they will get good opporunities in their life. Moreover, employer should update themselves day to day while doind short turm study.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response addresses the prompt only partially, which keeps the score at this level. While the student attempts to discuss the causes of employment difficulties for those over fifty and suggests potential measures, the ideas remain limited and under-developed. For instance, the introduction relies heavily on formulaic boilerplate phrases such as 'My view points regarding the statement greater extant' rather than clearly outlining the main arguments. The body paragraphs touch upon relevant concepts like technological adaptation and experience, but the supporting examples, such as the vague reference to 'The World Organisation' in 2023, lack specific detail and fail to fully explain the issues. To reach the next level, the writer needs to present a clearer overall position and extend their ideas with fully elaborated explanations and concrete, realistic examples rather than generalized statements.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organization present, featuring an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, but the response lacks a clear overall progression. Paragraphing is attempted, yet the flow between sentences often feels disjointed because cohesive devices are frequently inaccurate, inadequate, or misused. Phrases intended to link ideas, such as 'To commance with' and 'The second reason to proves my point', highlight mechanical and faulty referencing that draws attention to itself. Pronoun referencing is also occasionally unclear, making it difficult to follow the logical development of thought. To improve, the writer must ensure that transitional phrases are used correctly and naturally to connect ideas smoothly, and that each paragraph contains a unified theme that builds logically toward the conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for addressing the topic. Throughout the response, there are noticeable lexical errors in word choice, collocation, spelling, and word formation that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader and impede clear communication. Examples include 'expensives' instead of expenses, 'magor' instead of major, 'tachqunice' instead of techniques, 'qulifaction' instead of qualifications, and 'saminitars' instead of seminars. The student attempts to use some less common words, but frequent inaccuracies prevent the writing from achieving precision and flexibility. To progress to a higher band, the writer should focus on expanding their vocabulary range, paying close attention to correct word forms, improving spelling accuracy, and utilizing more natural collocations relevant to academic topics.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The grammatical structures employed show a limited range, with frequent errors that can cause difficulty for the reader. The writer relies heavily on simple sentence forms, and attempts at more complex structures are often faulty and grammatically incorrect. For instance, sentences like 'Some people think that after the age of over 50 less chance to get good opportunities' and 'age is not matter if person has better qualities' suffer from missing verbs, incorrect article usage, and flawed clause structures. Punctuation errors are also apparent throughout the text. To elevate the score to the next level, the writer needs to demonstrate a greater variety of complex sentence structures and improve grammatical control, particularly regarding subject-verb agreement, verb forms, and the correct use of prepositions and articles.

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