Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It definitely can be difficult for people in older ages to get a good job despite their experiences.

This issue arises primarily in the jobs that are more physical in nature, where you have to work in the field in varying conditions. Naturally, your body reaches its prime in 30s and then the body gradually starts to decline physically as you cross 40. For instance, A football player at around 30 can sprint for longer distances as compared to 10 or 15 years later. The age plays a cruicial factor in jobs which have a physical and competing nature.

In another area, if we explore another area of jobs that can be quite dangerous. For example, Firefighters or Law enforcement agencies. These types of jobs require robustness, athleticism, quick decisions and sometimes even working with injuries. As you grow older, even the tiny injuries hurt more and render you unable to move quickly, but people in their 30s can bear the pain and complete their tasks.

Therefore, I would say that age is one of the leading causes of this problem, but that does'nt mean we dont have any solutions for this. We can create more jobs inside offices , Older people can use their lifelong experience and make better decisions where younger people might still need guidance. For instance, when dealing with a customer that is either rude or not happy with the product, An older person having experience will know several strategies on how to keep control of the meeting as compared to someone new.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify plausible causes, especially the physical demands of field work and the fitness required in firefighting or law enforcement, and you give relevant examples such as football players and older workers’ experience with customers. However, the response addresses the task unevenly: the causes receive two paragraphs, while the measures are limited to creating office jobs and using older workers as advisers. These proposals are relevant but need fuller explanation—for example, how employers could redesign roles, provide retraining, or prevent age-based hiring decisions. The opening mainly restates the issue, and the conclusion does not clearly summarise your proposed solutions. Develop both parts of the question more evenly and make your overall position explicit to strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: it introduces the issue, presents two cause-focused paragraphs, and then turns to a possible solution. Paragraphing helps the reader follow this progression, and signposts such as “For instance” and “Therefore” make relationships between ideas visible. Some linking is repetitive or mechanical, however, and the phrase “In another area, if we explore another area” repeats the same idea without advancing it. The final paragraph also combines a general transition, a solution, and an example without a concluding sentence that ties them together. Use more precise transitions and clearer references, and organise the solutions in a fuller paragraph so the progression feels more balanced and connected.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic-related vocabulary, including “physical in nature,” “varying conditions,” “robustness,” “athleticism,” and “lifelong experience.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, and the examples are generally easy to understand. Some wording is imprecise or repetitive, such as “older ages,” “the age plays a crucial factor,” and the repeated use of “area.” There are also spelling and form errors, including “cruicial” and “does'nt,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for more natural collocations and a wider range of precise terms for employment barriers and solutions, such as age discrimination, transferable skills, and workplace adaptation. Proofreading would also help remove avoidable spelling slips.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “jobs that are more physical in nature” and a conditional comparison in the customer-service example. Most sentences communicate their meaning, but some grammatical and punctuation errors remain. For example, “your body reaches its prime in 30s” needs an article, while “A football player” and “An older person” are incorrectly capitalised after commas. The sentence beginning “Therefore, I would say” also contains errors in “does'nt mean we dont,” and the comma splice before “Older people can use” makes the transition awkward. Review articles, apostrophes, capitalisation, and sentence boundaries while continuing to practise varied complex structures.

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