Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In some parts of the world, it become very difficult to secure a good job for the people who aged above 50 as compared with young people, even though they had great experience. This essay will discuss causes and measures for this particular issue.

The primary reason for this is that older pupil have no modren skills to contribute to the growth of country. The aged puil are having out dated skills which are not essential for the current market in the country. However, people below 50 age have learned new techologies in their university cirruculum such as artificial intelligence and machine learning, which are perfect skills to develop country's economy. Moreover, youngstar's do more hard work and work longer hours. Older people have many health problems in that particular age, which doesn't allow them to do more physical and mental works because they wont have strength like teengers. Nevertheless, teengers have proper brain functioning to think creatively as well as physical power to face many hurdles. So, they can imersevly involve in activities more actively. Due to this, employement rate of middle aged group become increasingly common in some countries.

The first way to tackle the proplem is that separate age groups should have different job roles which fits them. When work is divided to parts and allocated according to thier age, then even above 50 aged group can have a job. As a result, they wont remain unemployeed and every one will get chance to show case their skills and enhance their experiences. In addition, government should implement few measures to support them such as, some roles should be only given to older people. When they give specific roles which is sutabile to their strength so that they can work instead of remaing as job less.

In conclusion,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify relevant causes, including outdated skills and employers’ preference for younger workers who may work longer hours, and you propose age-appropriate roles and government support. These points show an understanding of both parts of the question. However, the response addresses the task only partially because the causes and measures are mostly asserted rather than explained or supported with examples. For instance, the claim that older workers lack modern skills is broad, and the proposed measure of reserving some roles for older people is not explained in terms of how it would be implemented or why it would improve access to good jobs. The conclusion is left unfinished, so your overall position is not clearly brought together. Develop fewer ideas with specific explanations and examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph on causes, a paragraph on solutions, and an attempted conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “As a result,” and “In addition” help signal relationships between points. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and several ideas are joined without showing how they connect. The shift from older workers’ health to teenagers’ abilities, for example, is abrupt, while “Due to this” does not clearly identify which preceding point causes the stated employment trend. The conclusion contains only “In conclusion,” so the essay has no completed ending. Use clearer topic sentences, connect each explanation directly to its main point, and finish with a brief summary of the causes and solutions.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to employment and the economy, including “out dated skills,” “current market,” “artificial intelligence,” and “unemployed.” However, the range is limited and many spelling and word-choice errors make the writing less clear or natural. Examples include “puil,” “cirruculum,” “youngstar’s,” “proplem,” and “sutable.” Some phrases are also awkward, such as “physical and mental works” and “immersevly involve in activities.” These errors sometimes require the reader to work out the intended meaning, which limits the effectiveness of your vocabulary. Check spelling carefully and learn common collocations for work and employment. Prefer precise, natural phrases over attempts at complex wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both simple statements and some longer sentences with subordinate clauses, such as “even though they had great experience” and “When work is divided to parts and allocated according to their age.” This shows an attempt to vary sentence structure. However, errors are frequent, and some complex sentences are difficult to follow. For example, “it become very difficult” has incorrect subject–verb agreement, while “older pupil have” and “people below 50 age have learned” show problems with number and sentence construction. The final solution sentence beginning “When they give specific roles” is incomplete in its relationship to “so that.” Work on agreement, articles, verb forms, and complete sentence boundaries. Practise combining ideas in shorter, accurate sentences before adding more complex clauses.

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