Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

There is a on going issue that in some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience. Well thats true and there are many reasons for that. The emerging of new generation , coping with new office environments, demanding salary packages and much more . This issue needs to be highlighed by the government and they should take several supportive actions like offering them pensions and better health facilities . People should take benefit from their expertise by offering them consulting positions in their companies or a part time job.

In todays world , where Ai has distrupted every other feild and the world is shifting to entirely new model of employment . The people who have passed their 50 and have such great experience cant fit in these companies due to some factors . The salary of these people are much higher than any average manager so to fill up this gap company prefers the new emerging employees who can do the same work at less cost . Another reason is that with rapid change in technology the industry has become quite demanding , so for the people with such age arenot capable to learn and adapt new things as quickly as the young ones do . Similarly , aged people find it difficult to fit in with the new environment of the offices.

The one who has served the country for 50 years or more deserves respect and honour.The government should take several actions to help them like offering them pensions and better health facilities . So they can continue to live their lifes happily. The people should also take benefit from these people in the areas of their expertise by offering them consulting positions in their companies or a part time job in this way it will benefit both of them .

In conclusion , the better government policies and change of attitude towards these aged experienced people is the only feasible solution . With cooperation from both sides we can solve this problem easily and in a effective manner .

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion4.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both parts of the question: you identify causes such as employers preferring lower salaries and older workers finding technological change and new office environments challenging, then suggest pensions, health facilities, and consulting or part-time roles. Your position—that governments and employers should support experienced older people—is clear. However, several points are asserted rather than explained. For example, the claim that people over 50 are less able to learn new things is broad and would be stronger with qualification or an example. The proposed measures also need more detail about how they would improve access to good jobs, rather than only supporting people after employment becomes difficult. Develop each cause and solution with a specific explanation or example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, a paragraph on causes, a paragraph on solutions, and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow the broad direction of your argument. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven: the introduction lists several points, including “demanding salary packages,” without explaining them, and the causes paragraph moves from salary to technology to workplace fit with limited links between ideas. Connectors such as “Similarly” and “In conclusion” are present, but some transitions feel mechanical, and repeated references to government support and consulting roles make the response repetitive. Use topic sentences to establish each paragraph’s focus, then develop ideas in a clear sequence and use referencing to avoid repeating the same points.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “rapid change in technology,” “employment,” “expertise,” and “consulting positions.” These choices make the main ideas understandable. However, the range is limited in places, and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or informal, such as “the emerging of new generation,” “take benefit from,” and “salary packages.” Spelling errors—including “highlighed,” “distrupted,” and “feild”—also reduce accuracy. Aim for more precise expressions and check spelling carefully. For instance, you could describe employers’ preference for “lower-cost younger recruits” and propose “mentoring or advisory roles” as a way to use older workers’ experience.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a cause-and-effect structure in “The salary of these people are much higher … so … company prefers.” The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and punctuation are frequent enough to make parts difficult to read. Examples include “There is a on going issue,” “The salary … are,” and the fragment “The emerging of new generation, coping with new office environments…” Several sentences also run together or lack clear punctuation, particularly in the opening and conclusion. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check singular/plural agreement and article use. Breaking longer ideas into shorter, correctly punctuated sentences would improve control.

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