Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Age is a significant factor to get a good job nowadays. In several countries, it's very problmatic to get a good job for those people who has age more than 50 years although they have experience. In this eassy i will discuss the causes and the solutions of this problem also.

From my perspective, Health is a big cause of this problem. Those person who has age more than 50 years face alot of health problem. For instence Asthama, Hypatitis, Dibaties, Blood presure. These are the health issues people face after 50. These people are not consistent due to many health related issues. Because of this alot countries avoid these persons although they have experience. The problem of this solution these type of individuals would to focus on the health. Reagular light exercise, Jogging, Walking to maintain health

Futhermore, another cause of this problem is that Quick work. In the modern era world is moving rapidly in every field and we need to work quickly. Many countries avoid aged people because they are not fast enough. They do not manage the load of the work. Although they have experience. Instead many countries prefer young people because they have the potetial. I think the problem of this solution is to maintain your health and the crucial onr is Meditation. It hepls to build your reflexes and hepls to make your mindset strong.

Overall, Heath is the main problem they do not stay consistent because they have many health issues and the solution is maintrainance of health. Quick work are also a problem. world is moving so fast and the load of the work is too much. I think is this responsibility of the government to look after the aged persons and fulfill their re

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both parts of the question by identifying health and the pace of modern work as causes, then suggesting exercise and meditation. These ideas are relevant, but the response only partially develops them. For example, the list of illnesses does not explain clearly why employers might consider them a barrier, and the claim that older workers cannot work quickly is broad and unsupported. The proposed solutions focus mainly on individuals maintaining their health, while the task also invites wider measures; the final sentence begins to mention government responsibility but is unfinished. Your overall position is understandable, though the conclusion does not fully complete it. Explain each cause with a specific example and develop practical measures, such as workplace adjustments or age-discrimination protections.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs and a concluding paragraph. Connectors such as “Furthermore” and “Overall” help signal the stages of the essay, and each body paragraph focuses on a cause. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear. In the first body paragraph, the move from health problems to the solution is abrupt, and “The problem of this solution” makes the relationship difficult to follow. The second paragraph also shifts from work speed to meditation without a clear explanation of how meditation addresses employers’ concerns. Repeated references to “the problem” and “these people” are not always precise. Use clearer topic sentences and link each proposed measure directly to the cause it is intended to address.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “experience,” “health issues,” “consistent,” “potential” and “government.” However, the range is limited and several expressions are repeated or used inaccurately, which sometimes makes the meaning harder to follow. Phrases such as “Quick work,” “manage the load of the work” and “the problem of this solution” are not natural in this context. There are also frequent spelling errors, including “problmatic,” “eassy,” “instence” and “maintrainance.” These issues fit a limited but minimally adequate range: the main ideas can generally be understood, but word choice and spelling are noticeable obstacles. Build a topic vocabulary for employment and use a dictionary to check spelling and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including a concession with “although” and a cause-and-effect sentence beginning “Because of this.” However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently in basic sentence patterns, sometimes making the reader work to understand the point. For example, “those people who has age more than 50 years” has incorrect agreement and an unnatural clause structure; “Those person who has age” repeats these problems. Other examples include “Many countries avoid aged people because they are not fast enough” followed by the fragment “Although they have experience,” and the unfinished final sentence. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, complete sentences and clear links between clauses before attempting more complex structures.

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