Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Indeed,its hard for people over the age of 50 to get employed in some nations not withstanding their years of experience.In this passage, i will be stating the reasons for the increased number of unemployed aged adults.

Resistance to change, development and technology has lead to an increasing number of unemployed aged adults.many aged adults are rigid and would prefer to rely on past knowledge rather than evolving and learning about the latest version of technology that could make there work easier and better. company's prefer to employ people of updated knowledge and people that a willing to learn with the aim that could help the company reach it goals faster and better. learning and educating themselfs on the latest technology would increase the rate of employment and give them a better chance of job opportunity.

The adverse factors of ageing,for people over the age of 50 has caused an increase in the employment rate.frequent weakness and tiredness comes with ageing, this has lead to a decrease in the performance rate.also,health complications normaly occure at this stage resulting to frequent request for permission in other to visit the hospital.furthermore,people over the age of 50 forgets alot so they are likely forget task assigned to them . This cold be reduced if personal heath should be taken seriously from an early age and there is pulic awareness .

In conclusion, people over the age of 50 should be open to changes and take there health very seriously because the would contribute largely to their employments.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify two relevant causes—resistance to technological change and health-related concerns—and suggest learning new technology and taking health seriously. However, the response only partially answers the task: the second measure is vague, and there is little explanation of how employers or governments could address age discrimination or create suitable opportunities. The opening says you will give reasons, but the conclusion mainly repeats advice to older workers rather than summarising practical solutions. There are no examples or supporting evidence to develop the claims. The response is also 5 words below the 250-word minimum; the 9 words copied from the prompt were not counted. Develop both causes and give specific, feasible measures to address them.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Each body paragraph focuses on a main idea, and connectors such as “also” and “furthermore” help signal additions. However, progression within the paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the first moves from resistance to change to employers’ preferences and then to a proposed solution without clearly separating cause from measure. The conclusion also introduces little beyond the earlier advice. Some linking is mechanical, and punctuation and spacing make transitions less clear. Use topic sentences that distinguish causes from solutions, then organise each paragraph around one point with a clear explanation and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “resistance to change,” “latest version of technology,” “performance rate” and “health complications.” This gives the response enough language to communicate its main ideas, but the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate or repetitive. For example, “increased number of unemployed aged adults” is repeated, while “employment rate” does not clearly express the intended rise in unemployment. Spelling errors such as “there,” “themselfs,” “normaly” and “occure” are noticeable and can distract the reader. Aim for more precise terms for age discrimination, retraining and workplace flexibility, and proofread spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including a relative clause in “technology that could make there work easier” and a conditional structure in “This cold be reduced if…”. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some passages harder to read. Examples include “Resistance … has lead,” “many aged adults … would prefer,” and “people over the age of 50 forgets,” where verb forms or subject–verb agreement are not controlled. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent, as in the long sequence beginning “frequent weakness and tiredness comes with ageing.” Practise agreement, verb forms and sentence punctuation, and check each sentence for a clear subject and main verb.

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