Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-21
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.
What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Now a days providing jobs to older ages has become popular.In numerious countries there are a lot of oppourtunities for older ages individuals whereas in some countries older ages faced some difficulties.I strongly hold the view that older ages peoples facing difficulties in securing a job despite their experience.
To begin with,there are many reasons which surged this issue.For instance in many countries population is increasing day by day which creates problems in every sector because more individuals are ready to get a job than jobs seates.Every sector mainly prefer adults and youngers than older ages because they are freshies and physically fit to work all the day while adults do not work the whole day.Another reason is that older ages individuals demands high salary due to their experience and strong grip.Therefore,many companies do not pay to much on older ages individuals.For example last week I got a job as a clerk in college whereas there are two older ages persons who are also worked in a school as a clerk but college says we prefer younger and adults because they are freshies.
On other hand this challenging issue can be solve by taking some measures.First we should creates jobs on behalf of knowledge and experience and we shoud not select those peoples who do not have experience.Secondly our governments creates jobs that are only for older ages and also provides some additional benfits.Moreover privates sectors and companies prefer older ages than others.In conclusion by taking there steps we should eleminate this issue.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You address both parts of the question by identifying causes—competition for jobs, employers’ preference for younger workers, and salary expectations—and proposing measures such as experience-based recruitment and government support. Your position is clear, and the personal example about the college clerk vacancy helps illustrate age-based preference. However, several ideas are asserted rather than explained: for example, the link between population growth and older applicants’ difficulty is not made specific, and the proposed jobs “only for older ages” are not explained in terms of how they would work. Develop each cause and solution with clearer reasoning and a relevant example so the response addresses the task more fully and persuasively.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on causes, a paragraph on solutions, and a conclusion. Signposts such as “To begin with,” “On other hand,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the main stages. Within paragraphs, however, ideas sometimes move abruptly—for instance, the discussion shifts from population growth to employers’ preference for younger workers without clearly showing how these points connect. Some linking phrases are also used mechanically, and references such as “there steps” are unclear. Improve progression by grouping related points, using more precise references, and explaining the connection between each claim and the next.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “population,” “experience,” “salary,” “companies,” and “additional benefits,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “jobs seates,” “freshies,” “strong grip,” and “on behalf of knowledge.” Spelling errors, including “numerious,” “oppourtunities,” and “eleminate,” also make the writing less clear and controlled. Aim to learn accurate phrases for employment and recruitment, and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you explain the causes and proposed measures without relying on repeated general terms such as “older ages” and “jobs.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including a reason clause beginning “because” and a contrast introduced by “whereas.” However, control is inconsistent, and errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction sometimes make the reader work to understand the meaning. Examples include “older ages faced,” “older ages individuals demands,” “this challenging issue can be solve,” and “our governments creates.” Several sentences also run together without appropriate punctuation, as in the opening. Practise forming accurate subject–verb combinations and using consistent tense, then check each sentence for a clear subject and main verb. Building reliable sentence patterns will make your ideas easier to follow.
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