Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In present generation, some people over the age of individuals can get essiest jobs despite their experience and knowlege skills. i believe that is beneficial way for grandparents who can interest in jobs over the age. which people responsibility and depends on human begins get good jobs regarding their experience about the work.i believe that is one of the main stucture of get money to make more life easier.in this essay, i will elobanate my reason and example before reaching to its conclusation.

First and foremost, i tend to deem that if their have own education knowlege, great opportunities, and skills, which is one of important perspective for any jobs. then, in my view, it doesn't matter of age and money.However, there have experience anbout this types of improved scoiety and make personal growth.Nowadays, education and technology is a powerful tool that shapes modern life by improving communication,education,healthcare and productivity.i believe that it not can be difficult for people over the age of 50 to get excellent business despite their experice.For example, governmet should allow to over the age people who are interest in jobs and become a life more easier to get good jobs.

Moreover, grandparents and older people as well as students are get a jobs in any field. they have job experience,how to communicate with each other, how they are grow, how they reach customer. which will helping the understanding of better creer opportunities,improved society as far as health well- being. nevertheless,few grandparents are want to get jobs because they need money for their family and pay the living expences or food as well.for instance, poor people and middle class family are want to jobs in over the age because they want to make life more easier and great lifestyle for childrens.as result, these types of developing experience measures could be solve in any difficult time, don't matter of people over the age of get the supportive jobs.

To sum up, even though some people over the age of get crucial work and business while their experinece. i believe that would be convenient for people to develop their personally and profically growth.many skills such as, comminication, problem solving and teamwork,these kind of experience to support their jobs and contribute to accurate of get good jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response makes a general attempt to discuss older people’s employment, and it mentions experience, education, technology and government support. However, it does not clearly answer both parts of the question: causes of the difficulty are not identified, and the proposed measures remain vague. For example, “government should allow to over the age people” does not explain what policy or action is intended. The position is also difficult to follow, since the opening suggests older people can get jobs, while the prompt asks why they struggle. The examples about families needing money are relevant to older workers’ circumstances but do not explain the employment barrier or show how to address it. Develop distinct causes and practical solutions, each supported with a clear example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to organise the response into an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and transitions such as “First and foremost,” “Moreover” and “To sum up” signal stages in the essay. However, progression within paragraphs is often unclear: the discussion moves from education and technology to government permission, then to family expenses, without showing how these points connect to the causes and solutions in the question. Several sentences are fragments or are joined in ways that obscure relationships, such as “which will helping the understanding of better creer opportunities.” Referencing is also unclear in phrases such as “these types of developing experience measures.” Use one main idea per paragraph, explain its link to the task, and connect examples explicitly to the point they support.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response attempts some topic-related vocabulary, including “job experience,” “communication,” “productivity,” “problem solving” and “teamwork.” These choices show an effort to discuss employment and workplace skills. However, vocabulary is often basic, repetitive or inaccurately selected, and spelling errors frequently distract the reader. Examples include “essiest,” “knowlege,” “experinece” and “expences.” Some phrases are difficult to interpret, such as “main stucture of get money” and “accurate of get good jobs,” while “grandparents” is repeatedly used where “older people” or “older workers” would be more precise. Build a reliable set of employment-related terms and check spelling, word forms and collocations so that your intended meaning is clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts both simple and longer sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “because” and “while,” but control is inconsistent and many sentences are difficult to understand. Errors in verb forms and agreement appear in examples such as “people ... are get a jobs,” “which will helping,” and “these types ... could be solve.” Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also unreliable: “Nowadays, education and technology is a powerful tool...” combines agreement and sentence-control problems, while several ideas begin with lowercase letters or are joined without clear punctuation. Articles and plural forms are often missing or incorrect. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, then add subordinate clauses; carefully check subject–verb agreement, verb forms, articles and sentence boundaries.

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