Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Some countries offers only young people for getting jobs. There are difficult for older people to get jobs at the age of fifty despite how they are expirenced. i, am some how agree with the statement . Well i will tell my opinion after analyzing the following statements.

First of all we are living in a modern era where every country has compition for his progress. Every one want to get best than others for example in education,health,techonologies,infrastructures,enjeenering even in any field. Because we have no choice without it. As world has day by day passion of progress so we should focus on young blood. For instance when we will have young people for jobs they will be more energetic. They will have good memory and will be more healthy mentally and physically. If young people will do jobs they will handle in better way. Because young people always have sharp memory. For example there are jobs of accontants or jobs in banks they will focus mentally. They also have good physical health more energy so they can achieve their tasks easily,as in offices you have to sit for whole day you should physically strong.

On the other hand older people have less energy to do physicall jobs and also they have less memory as compare to youngsters so thats why in many countries over the age of 50 older people hav less chance for getting jobs. No matter how many they have expierences.

To sum up i, agree with this statement that in some countries there are less opportunities for jobs for older people who are above 50.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify a relevant cause: employers may prefer younger workers because they are seen as more energetic, physically fit, and mentally sharp. Examples such as office work and banking help illustrate this view. However, the task asks both why the problem occurs and what measures could solve it, and your response gives no practical measures. The opening also says you will explain your opinion, but the conclusion only repeats that older people have fewer opportunities; it does not establish a clear, developed position on the causes and solutions. Several claims about older workers’ memory and energy are broad and unsupported. To improve, address both parts directly, suggest measures such as retraining or age-discrimination rules, and explain how these would help.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

Your response has a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, a paragraph about younger workers, a contrast about older workers, and a conclusion. Connectors such as “First of all,” “On the other hand,” and “To sum up” make the main stages visible. However, progression within the body is limited: the first main paragraph repeats the idea that young people are energetic and have good memory, while the contrast paragraph largely restates the same comparison. The conclusion does not bring together the causes or offer a solution. Some links, including “Because we have no choice without it,” are unclear, and the opening moves abruptly from the topic to a personal announcement. Group related points and use clearer links between cause, example, and consequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the general comparison, including “progress,” “energetic,” “physical health,” and “opportunities.” There are also attempts to use more specific examples, such as “accountants” and “banks.” However, the range is limited and several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, which sometimes makes the meaning harder to follow: “young people for getting jobs,” “focus on young blood,” and “passion of progress” do not express the intended ideas naturally. Spelling errors such as “compition,” “techonologies,” and “expierences” are noticeable. Build a more precise set of phrases for employment and solutions, and check spelling and collocations so your ideas are expressed clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with reasons and examples, for instance, “If young people will do jobs they will handle in better way.” This shows an effort to connect ideas, but complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some passages difficult to read. Examples include “Some countries offers,” where the subject and verb do not agree, and “There are difficult,” which uses the wrong sentence pattern. Conditional forms are also inconsistent, as in “If young people will do jobs,” and articles and punctuation are often missing or misplaced. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, then build longer sentences using controlled clauses. Proofread for agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries.

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