Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In some countries , it can be very problematic for the people above the age of 50 to find a jobs . To begin with , there are several reasons why this topic is important in our daily life . The main reason is that age discrimination in employment can have direct effects on people and society . Many people face this issue in our daily lives , and it can influence their daily lifestyle , in different ways . For example , may affect on people wrok's , education , health , or relationships . In pakistan when people above the age of 50 then people do not get the good job in everywhere . Then people find the job as a security gaurd its very hard job people is very poor . Some amount of earn money people they work anywhere . in addition , young people and families can also be influenced this situation . Another important topic is that age discrimination in employment can have both possitive and nagitive effects . it mainly depends how people use their and how they deal with the situation . Moreever , there are some possible ways to improve the situation . People should have proper knowledge and should make responsible decisions . The government , schools , and families can also play important role by providing guidance and support . For instance , simple rules and better awareness can help people make better choices . By concluding , age discrimination in employment is an important issue that should not be ignored . if people and society work together , the nagitive effects can be reduced and the situation can be improved .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response recognises age discrimination as the central issue and briefly refers to its effects on individuals and families. However, it only partially answers the question: the causes are not clearly explained, and the proposed measures—“proper knowledge,” responsible decisions, and “better awareness”—are general rather than specific solutions to employers’ reluctance to hire older workers. The example about people in Pakistan becoming security guards hints at economic hardship, but it is not developed with a clear explanation or supporting detail. The discussion of “both possitive and nagitive effects” also does not directly address the task. To strengthen the response, explain concrete causes, such as employers’ assumptions about adaptability, and propose targeted measures such as anti-discrimination enforcement or retraining programmes.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response, with an opening, a section introduced by “Moreover,” and a concluding statement. Some links between ideas are understandable, including the move from discrimination to its effects. However, the overall progression is unclear: the opening discusses effects, the Pakistan example is difficult to follow, and the paragraph about “both possitive and nagitive effects” does not connect clearly to the causes or solutions. Linking phrases such as “To begin with,” “In addition,” and “By concluding” are used, but they do not create a consistent argument, and several ideas appear in a long, loosely connected sequence. Use separate paragraphs for causes and solutions, and make each paragraph develop one main point with clear links between its explanation and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses some relevant vocabulary, including “age discrimination,” “employment,” “guidance,” and “support,” so the topic is generally identifiable. However, the range is limited and several phrases are repetitive or imprecise, such as “important topic,” “daily life,” and “better choices.” There are also noticeable spelling and word-choice errors, including “wrok's,” “gaurd,” “possitive,” and “nagitive,” which make parts of the response harder to read. Some expressions, such as “people find the job as a security guard,” do not sound natural in this context. Build a more precise set of terms for causes and solutions—for example, “age-based hiring bias,” “transferable skills,” and “workplace retraining”—and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts some longer sentences, for example, “Many people face this issue in our daily lives, and it can influence their daily lifestyle,” but most structures are simple, and attempts at more complex sentences are often faulty. Errors in articles, agreement, and sentence construction occur frequently: “find a jobs,” “people above the age of 50 then people do not get,” and “people and society work together” after an unclear conditional clause. Some sentences are incomplete, as in “For example, may affect on people…”; others lack clear grammatical links between clauses. Punctuation and capitalisation are also inconsistent, with spaces before commas and full stops and lower-case sentence openings. Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses while checking that each sentence has a clear subject and complete verb.

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