Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years, it is very difficult for peoble over the age of 50 to get good jobs, even they have experience for years. This essay will examine the main causes such as health issuses faced by the old age peoples and the measures regarding this issue in the upcoming paragraph.

One major reason for this is that, nowasdays, people tend to recruit new generation people they strongly believe that they have a potential to give new ideas and due to their younger age that the old citizen. The main reason behind this is, oldage people will probably have some health issues they would not able to work like the younger age people even though they have lot of experience as the time goes they tend to become physically weak. For instance, people who have a experience of 25 years, while a person who is 25 years old learn the current updates faster, enthusiastic and would be updated in of the current datas compared to the old citizen. As a result, the young age people are replacing the experienced candidates.

One effective way to rectify this problem is, how much ever the young age people work, the lessons that the experience given to the people could not be obtained by the current generation, all the company should have a compulsory criteria for recruiting people with experience in their board committe. This means that, current people can be updated about the modern things, but some qualities which are gained through time will play a major role in the working sector.For example, if we take stock marketing recent employees will know the coding and how it works, but the person having a decades of experience would easily crash the stock market with his experience. Therefore, we should consider appointing old people in the advisory board which will be a great benefit for the company or any sectors.

In conclusion, health issue is a main cause for not recruitting aged people, but these can be reduced by appointing them in a position where there knowledge is necessary.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question by identifying employers’ preference for younger workers and proposing that experienced people serve on advisory boards. The position is clear, and the examples about current knowledge and stock-market experience help illustrate your points. However, the causes are not fully balanced: health is presented as a major barrier, but the essay does not explain how employers’ assumptions about older workers affect hiring or distinguish health limitations from age-based bias. The proposed measure is also narrow and would benefit from practical detail, such as retraining, flexible roles, or anti-discrimination policies. Develop these ideas more fully and connect each measure directly to the causes to make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for causes and solutions, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “One major reason,” “For instance,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the main stages of the argument. However, some links are mechanical or unclear. For example, “The main reason behind this is” repeats the preceding explanation, while the long sentence beginning “This means that” combines several points without a clear relationship. The example about crashing the stock market also interrupts the argument because its intended meaning is uncertain. Use more precise referencing and divide complex points into shorter, logically connected sentences; this would make progression smoother and cohesion less repetitive.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “recruit,” “potential,” “experience,” “advisory board,” and “working sector,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word-choice and spelling problems make the writing less precise. Phrases such as “old citizen,” “current datas,” and “compulsory criteria” are unnatural or inaccurate in context, while “crash the stock market with his experience” does not clearly express the intended benefit of experience. Spelling errors such as “peoble,” “issuses,” and “recruitting” are also noticeable. Build a more accurate range of employment-related collocations and check spelling and word forms carefully so your meaning is consistently clear.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “even though,” “while,” and “but,” and the overall message can usually be followed. However, some sentence structures are faulty, and errors with articles, agreement, verb forms, and punctuation reduce accuracy. For example, “even they have experience for years” needs a clearer concessive structure, and “they would not able to work” is missing a verb form. In “all the company should have a compulsory criteria,” the determiner and agreement are problematic. Several sentences also run together, particularly around “working sector.For example.” Practise building accurate complex sentences, checking each clause for a complete verb, and using sentence boundaries consistently.

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