Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this contemporary world it could be challenging for the fifty plus old age people to find jobs and utilize thire experience. because of high compitition and less job opportunities, however this matter can be solve by starting own business.

One major factore, that may couse unempoyement in the old age workers is high competition in the world. in unsufficent resources the people are going to be highly compete with eachother day by day to eccess the facilities. For instance, in China because of the high copetition a large number of people is jobless due to the age differece. Furthermore, its a fact thalt highly devoloped companies valued the potentiol more than experience. additionally in densed populated world it considerd important to provide more opportunities specially to the youn people rether than agents.

However, This matter can be solved by providing sufficient business opportunities to the people in thier fifties or above. For instance, A school or college profecers get retired from his career so they should open an academy where he can contineue their life as more cofortable. Furthermore, old age people can jion different trainig centers to improve their skills that is to compete with modren people. Another measure which can adresse this challenge is thal government should introduce new laws to prevent age descrimination.

In conclusion, In this highly competative world finding jobs has increasingly challenging for people over the age of fifty. high copition and age decrimination are the main factors, Nevertheles, business opportunities and government regulations can help to reduce this problem.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question by identifying causes and proposing measures, and your position is clear: competition and age discrimination contribute to the problem, while business opportunities and government rules could help. The example of a retired professor opening an academy makes one solution more concrete. However, some ideas are less fully explained than others. For example, the claim that companies value “potential more than experience” is relevant, but you could explain why employers prefer younger applicants or how this affects hiring. The China example is also broad and its link between unemployment and age is not made clear. Develop each cause and measure with a more precise explanation or supporting example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on causes, a paragraph on solutions, and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Furthermore,” “For instance,” and “In conclusion” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, some connections feel mechanical, and the relationship between ideas is occasionally unclear. In the causes paragraph, “high competition” and limited resources are introduced, but the China example does not clearly show how age causes unemployment. The reference to “agents” is also difficult to connect to the point about opportunities for young people. Improve progression by making each paragraph follow a clear sequence—claim, explanation, and relevant example—and use pronouns and transitions only where their references are clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “age discrimination,” “business opportunities,” “competition,” and “government regulations.” These choices show an effort to discuss causes and solutions beyond very basic language. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause, as in “thire,” “compitition,” “eccess,” and “decrimination.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “fifty plus old age people,” “highly compete,” and “modern people.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. For example, use “people over 50,” “compete for limited opportunities,” and “younger workers” to express your ideas more clearly and appropriately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both simple and more extended sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “because,” “where,” and “that,” and the overall meaning is generally understandable. Some grammatical errors remain, however, particularly in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries. For example, “this matter can be solve” should be “this matter can be solved,” while “a large number of people is jobless” needs “are jobless.” The opening “because of high competition…” is a sentence fragment, and several sentences begin with lowercase letters after full stops. There are also unclear shifts in pronouns in the academy example (“they,” “his,” and “he”). Practise checking complete sentences, subject–verb agreement, and consistent pronoun reference.

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