Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In some countries over 50 years old exparienced people are struggle to find a good employment for them. The main reason is to make opportunities for young genaration and maintain there work speed. In this essay I will clearly express the reasons of this perticular problem and discuss about the solution of this issue.

Fristly, the world polupation are highly increased world widely and also the number of unemployment young people are increase rapidly. As result, athurities try to make jobs vacancy for them. That's why, in some countries companies reduce the old employs and give opportunities for new recrute. For example, Bangladesh is a over populate country, so most of the companies or industries make a age limitation for there emploies. As a result, It's highly help them to reduce unemployment form over populate countries. Moreover, sometimes the old worker are unable to match the work flow of the companies. That why, then companies requer young worker to maintain the work flow.

For this reason, sometime the older people do not have enough wealth to lead thier rest of the life. If goverments or industries focus on them and give a good amount of pantion, it would be help them to lead a good life. Additionally, companies also recurte them as a courch of the young workers. It's help them to earn money and the young workers are also benifited by learn skills from professional

In the conclution, the over unemployment is the main reason of this problem. If the goverment and companies help them by financially or employed them as a courch this problem might be minimized.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both causes and possible measures, and the Bangladesh example gives one cause a relevant context. The response identifies competition for jobs among younger people and employers’ concerns about older workers keeping pace; it also proposes pensions and employing experienced people to coach younger staff. However, these ideas are only partly developed. The claim that companies reduce older employees to create vacancies needs explanation, and the coaching proposal is introduced briefly without showing how employers could implement it. The conclusion repeats the proposed measures but does not clarify which would be most effective. Develop each main point with a clear explanation and a specific example, and make your position on the causes and solutions more explicit throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable introduction, a paragraph on causes, a paragraph on measures, and a conclusion, so the reader can identify its broad structure. Linking expressions such as “Firstly,” “Moreover,” and “Additionally” help signal the sequence of points. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the discussion moves from population growth to age limits and then to work speed without fully explaining the links. Some connections are also awkward or repetitive, including “For this reason” before the paragraph on financial support and repeated references to “this problem.” Use clearer topic sentences and connect each explanation directly to the point it supports. More precise referencing and fewer formulaic transitions would make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to employment and workplace issues, including “age limitation,” “work flow,” “unemployment,” and “professional,” and the reader can generally infer your intended meaning. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the message difficult to interpret. For example, “good employment for them” is less natural than “suitable jobs,” while “recrute them as a courch” appears to mean hiring older workers as coaches. There are also frequent spelling errors, such as “exparienced,” “polupation,” and “pantion,” which reduce clarity. Build a bank of accurate employment-related phrases and check spelling and word forms carefully before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including a conditional structure in “If goverments or industries focus on them … it would be help them.” This shows an effort to express cause and consequence, but the structure is not controlled accurately. Errors in agreement and verb forms occur throughout, as in “the world polupation are highly increased” and “the number … are increase rapidly.” Articles and sentence construction are also problematic, for example “Bangladesh is a over populate country” and “the older people do not have enough wealth to lead thier rest of the life.” These frequent errors can make the reader pause. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, past and present forms, articles, and conditional patterns, then proofread each sentence for a complete grammatical structure.

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