Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Due to the increasing Population all over the world many companies tend to hire young and energetic people who are willing to perform at their fullest effortlessly.

even though people over the age of 50 have immense work experience companies these days prefer young personnel as they could be trained as per the company's benifits and also to make the specific employee flexible with professional new experiences.

Nowadays People above the age of 50 tend to get lethargic in almost every possible way simply because of the age factor. for instance, many indian government employees who are above 50 years show up very late for their work and tend to perform very poorly, not only because of their age but also because of most of the people who are above 50 are obese. obesity has become the common concern all over the world.

inorder to overcome the challenges of obesity people must really start excercising every now and then and must maintain their overall fitness to perform well in almost every possible scenarios.

obviously people who are above 50 years cannot possess the same energy as youngsters, so they can improvise basic mobility excercises which includes briscwalking, slow jogging, Better breathing exercises that improves concentration. also due to their lack of experience in artificial intelligence also barres them from getting good jobs when people are over 50 years of age.

in conclusion, people over 50 must be physically fit and should gain any latest possible information that's related to artificial intelligence and its applications so that they can perform well and show the actual results

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify several relevant causes, including employers’ preference for younger staff, the perceived ease of training them, and older applicants’ limited familiarity with AI. You also offer measures such as improving fitness and learning about AI. However, the response only partially develops the task: the discussion of obesity and lethargy is broad and relies on a generalised example about Indian government employees, while the link between fitness and obtaining a good job is not clearly explained. The proposed measures also focus mainly on older workers; you could address employers’ responsibilities, such as providing retraining or preventing age discrimination. State your position more clearly and explain each cause and solution with specific, balanced support.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic overall structure: it introduces the issue, discusses causes, suggests measures, and ends with a conclusion. Some links between ideas are also signalled by phrases such as “for instance,” “in order to,” and “in conclusion.” However, progression within the body is uneven. The paragraph about fitness shifts suddenly to AI, and the relationship between these points is not made clear. Several ideas are grouped into long paragraphs, while the opening sentence begins with a lowercase “even though” as a separate paragraph. Organise the response into distinct paragraphs for causes and solutions, and use clearer transitions to show how each point supports your argument. This would make the organisation more coherent and less abrupt.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt some topic-related vocabulary, including “work experience,” “flexible,” “obesity,” “mobility exercises,” and “artificial intelligence.” These choices show an effort to discuss employment and health rather than relying entirely on basic language. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or awkward, such as “perform at their fullest effortlessly,” “trained as per the company’s benefits,” and “latest possible information.” Spelling errors, including “benifits,” “excercising,” and “briscwalking,” also reduce accuracy. Aim for more precise employment vocabulary and check spelling carefully. For example, describe employers as “recruiting younger candidates” and older workers as needing “digital skills training,” rather than using unclear or unnatural phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a concession beginning “even though” and a cause-and-effect explanation with “simply because.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. For example, “even though people over the age of 50 have immense work experience companies these days prefer young personnel” needs punctuation between the introductory clause and main clause. In “many Indian government employees … show up very late … and tend to perform,” the sentence makes a broad claim but does not clearly control its structure. There are also inconsistent capitalisation and sentence boundaries, such as lowercase sentence openings and “in conclusion.” Practise accurate clause punctuation, sentence boundaries, and consistent capitalisation before adding more complex structures.

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