Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience.

What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Older people is essential part of any society. they face several problem related to financial security, instead of worthy experience. This essay will discuss the causes of this problem and significant efforts should be taken to solve this issue.

There are many causes of this problem. Firstly, older people do not have good health and suffer different kinds of diseaes. Secondly, older people are physically weak, they are unable to do alot of work that require in a workplace. Thirdly, older community is not fully aware to the modern technology. They struggle to understang the advance technology. for example, a company can prefer younger graduated instead of older people who are facing heart related illness and do not know how to work in computer. Therefore it is harder for older people to find a suitable job in society.

These problem impact the lifestyle of older people. They can not afford basic necessities of life due to lack of money. They feel isolated from the whole society. sometime, they prefer to move oldage home for better care and some of the basic need.

To overcome this problem, there are argent need to sovle this issue for improvement in older coummunity. Firstly government should introduce a pension sytem for every older person that systen can secure this weak people financially. Secondly, government should provide free medince and checkup to older community. By doing this, burden on the shoulder of happy life is reduce. They can easily buy basic things and do not need to go for further job.

In conclusion, older people face difficulty to find any job in many countries. That's why, it is harder for them to survival because they can not fullfil their need. This problem can be solve by government effective measures related to pension system.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both causes and possible measures, and your position is clear: older people face barriers and government support could help. The causes you identify—health problems, physical demands and limited familiarity with technology—are relevant, and the example of an employer preferring a younger graduate helps illustrate the issue. However, the response only partly develops the task. The proposed pension and free medical care may ease financial and health pressures, but they do not directly explain how people over 50 could obtain good jobs. The effects paragraph on isolation and basic needs also takes space without advancing the causes-and-solutions discussion. Develop practical employment measures, such as retraining, age-discrimination rules or flexible roles, and explain how each would work.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on causes, one on effects, a solutions paragraph and a conclusion. Sequencing within the causes paragraph is easy to follow, with “Firstly,” “Secondly” and “Thirdly” guiding the reader. However, progression is sometimes mechanical, and the effects paragraph interrupts the direct movement from causes to solutions. Some links and references are unclear, as in “By doing this, burden on the shoulder of happy life is reduce,” which makes the relationship between the proposed support and its result difficult to follow. The conclusion repeats the main point but does not bring the proposed measures together. Keep each paragraph focused on the task’s two questions and use clearer links between claims and explanations.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “financial security,” “modern technology,” “pension system” and “basic necessities.” There are also attempts to express more specific concepts, such as “heart related illness.” However, the range is limited and several inaccurate word choices, collocations and spelling errors make parts difficult to understand. Examples include “older community,” “argent need,” “burden on the shoulder of happy life” and “survival.” Spelling problems such as “diseaes,” “understang” and “medince” also reduce clarity. Build a more precise set of phrases for employment barriers and solutions, and check spelling and natural word combinations. For instance, describe “age discrimination” or “workplace retraining” rather than relying on broad references to older people’s difficulties.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple sentences and longer structures, including a relative clause in “work that require in a workplace” and a conditional example beginning “a company can prefer younger graduated.” This shows some effort to vary sentence forms, but control is inconsistent, and errors occur often enough to make several sentences awkward or unclear. Examples include “Older people is essential part,” “These problem impact,” and “This problem can be solve,” where agreement or verb forms are incorrect. Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention: “Older people” begins a new sentence after a full stop but is written with a lowercase letter, and “for example” is not capitalised after a full stop. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles and verb forms before adding more complex structures.

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