Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries these days, the number of people continuing their education after school has increased, and the range of courses available at universities and colleges has also increased.

Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years, people are more likely to continue their academic life after graduated from school. Lately the availability of colleges and universities increased, so getting in an university or colleges are common sight event to the population. From my perspective, it is a good sign of positive development happens in our education and culture. So, this essay will discuss why people value education so much lately, and how is that affect to us in a beneficial ways.

First and foremost, let's take a look at why people value education. It is because they understand the importance of education in our life. For instance, to get better employment opportunity they should have profound knowledges and certificate. By having general and profound knowledges about our environment or our world give us the wing to fly through everything we always had question why.

Furthermore, education can suggest us numerous opportunities in life such as an advantages of employment or even the chance to get into the higher status of the population. Also the attitude comes from public will change once you become educated and smart human being. You will get the respect, i think it is one of the reasons why people value education so much lately.

There is a debate going around about education versus hard-work. Some of the population believes that educated people can make their life easier by not working physically but mentally using their brain. On the other hand, rest of them argues that hard-work will always pay off whether you educated or not. It is true for both sides but i have preference in the first statement rather than the second one.

In conclusion, I consider that valuing education is the greatest thing that we can do for the upcoming positive development in our future in educational fields.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You clearly state a positive view, especially in the introduction and conclusion, and give relevant reasons such as improved employment prospects and social respect. However, the response only partially addresses the specific development in the prompt: the growing number of people continuing education and the wider range of courses. Much of the discussion shifts to why education is valuable in general, and the paragraph comparing education with hard work is not clearly connected to the increase in participation or course choice. Several claims, such as education giving people “the wing to fly,” are not explained with a concrete example. To strengthen the response, keep each reason tied to the trend in the question and develop it with a specific example or explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “First and foremost,” “Furthermore,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. However, progression is uneven: the paragraph beginning “There is a debate going around” introduces a comparison with hard work without showing how it supports your position on increased higher education and course availability. Some links are also mechanical, and references such as “that” in “how is that affect to us” are unclear. Build a clearer line of reasoning by making each paragraph develop one relevant point and using transitions that explain the relationship between ideas, rather than relying mainly on signposting phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “employment opportunity,” “certificate,” “higher status,” and “educational fields,” and you attempt more expressive language in “the wing to fly.” This gives you a basic range for discussing education, but several word choices and collocations are noticeably inaccurate or unnatural, which sometimes makes the meaning less clear. Examples include “academic life,” “common sight event,” “profound knowledges,” and “the attitude comes from public.” There is also repetition of “education” and “value education.” Aim for more precise, natural combinations and check whether nouns are countable and whether a phrase fits its context. For example, “employment opportunities” and “gain respect” would express your intended meanings more clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “because,” “once,” and “whether,” but complex structures are often faulty and errors occur frequently. For example, “after graduated from school” needs a corrected verb pattern, while “how is that affect to us” has incorrect question-word order and verb form. Agreement and articles are also problematic in “getting in an university or colleges are common sight,” and “By having … knowledges … give us” does not form a clear grammatical subject and verb. These errors can make the reader pause, although the overall meaning is usually recoverable. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, then build longer sentences and check verb forms, agreement, articles, and punctuation.

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