Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries these days, the number of people continuing their education after school has increased, and the range of courses available at universities and colleges has also increased.

Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It is known that the number of students pursuing their education after school has rose significantly and the variety of courses at different educational institutions have been increased as well. I completely agree that this is a positive development because it increases employment opportunities, creates a better society and important break throughs are witnessed due to it.

In detail, the increase in pursuit of education and its courses is directly proportional to the increase in employment opportunities. An increase in education results in an increase in knowledge of a particular individual. It is evident that an employer is more likely to hire an employee consisting of a vast amount of knowledge in contrast to the one, who does not have any. As a result, creativity is increased and many more ideas are brought into practice. Consequently, creating more job opportunities. For instance, an employer hires a web developer and who creates a website, for that website an SEO would be needed as well. Hence, a job opportunity would be created automatically.

Furthermore, an increase in education also helps with the civilization of a society and how people interact with each other. People in a society who have similar level of education tend to become successful together. As a result a healthy and a creative environment is created. For instance, educated people in Africa where there is a shortage of water create a well and an electric motor. With the help of people pursuing their education and doing research work including PhD's, important breakthroughs are witnessed especially in the field of science and its sub-categories.

In conclusion, the increase in people's education is a beneficial factor for everyone because it creates job opportunities, a better society and important break throughs are witnessed due to it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you consider the growth in further education and course choice positive, and you maintain that view in the conclusion. You also address the development through relevant benefits, including employment, social cooperation and scientific progress. The employment example gives a concrete illustration of how one role may create demand for another. However, some claims are asserted more than explained: the link between similar education levels and a successful society is unclear, and the example about building a well and electric motor needs a clearer connection to university courses or further study. Develop each main point with a more explicit explanation of how the trend produces the stated benefit, and qualify broad claims where appropriate.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the ideas generally progress from employment to wider social and scientific benefits. Linking expressions such as “Furthermore,” “As a result” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. At times, however, cohesion feels mechanical or the relationship between sentences is not fully clear. For example, “Consequently, creating more job opportunities” is a sentence fragment rather than a smoothly connected result, while the transition from the Africa example to research breakthroughs is abrupt. Make the links between examples and claims more explicit, and vary how you connect ideas rather than relying repeatedly on formulaic transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “employment opportunities,” “creativity,” “research work” and “breakthroughs,” and the meaning is generally clear. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “pursuing their education” and “educational institutions.” Some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, though: “the civilization of a society” does not naturally express social improvement, and “an employee consisting of a vast amount of knowledge” is not idiomatic. “Break throughs” should be written as one word, “breakthroughs.” Aim for precise, natural combinations of words and avoid inflated phrasing; this will make the argument sound more fluent and controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including cause-and-effect structures and relative clauses, and the main message remains understandable. Some grammatical errors persist. For example, “has rose” should be “has risen,” and “the variety of courses … have been increased” has a subject–verb agreement problem and an awkward passive construction. The sentence beginning “Consequently, creating…” is incomplete, and “an employer hires a web developer and who creates” has a faulty clause structure. There are also article and number issues in “a similar level” and “a healthy and a creative environment.” Review verb forms, agreement and sentence boundaries, then check that each clause has a clear subject and finite verb.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.