Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries these days, the number of people continuing their education after school has increased, and the range of courses available at universities and colleges has also increased.

Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Education plays an important role in students life. A number of countries these days, many people continuing their study afetr school has increased study. Many university and colleges has also grow courrses and availble at their. However, it is importnt to students . It is positive devlopment and improve country level.

Firstly, education role is essential for every person. firstly, nowadays, high company are requirements to post graduate people and inteliigence people.In the past, there was no requirement for highly educated people, but at present, people require higher studies. For example, goole and crime rates website only prefer high educated people because they perovide wages around 2 lakh ruppes each person. it is monthly income. As result, a result, traditional high school education is no longer sufficient to secure a successful career, leading to a rise in university enrollment. Moreover, Nowadys, technology is improving and tehy useful in daily life, so they learn to students and make new some gaject. Furthermore, nowaadays comapnies has not show theroy people, but htey show partical human. so it is very import significantly to people.

On other hand, at present people make degrees and greduate so, it impact on job sectors. For example, manpeople face shortage jobs and they do not easily find job and they study in job sectors. In addition, many samll company requirement for high educate people so, in past people not found easy job and high wages job.

In counclusion, Technology is very importan which is learn many people. it iss positive devlopment in countries. While, samll company requrie higher education people. it is nagative devlop,ent to people.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You state a clear overall view in the introduction and conclusion: you consider the trend positive, while also mentioning a possible disadvantage for employment. The discussion of education helping people qualify for careers is relevant, and the reference to companies seeking graduates gives an example. However, the response only partially develops the question. The benefits of the wider range of courses are not explained, and the employment concern is unclear: you say people face a shortage of jobs, then suggest small companies require highly educated workers. The technology point is also difficult to follow. Develop two or three relevant ideas with clear explanations and examples, and make the relationship between each point and your positive or negative judgement explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and signposts such as “Firstly,” “On other hand” and “In conclusion” show an attempt to organise the discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is difficult to follow because several ideas are joined without clear links. For example, the first body paragraph moves from graduate requirements to wages, technology and practical skills, without explaining how these points connect. Some linking phrases are repeated or used awkwardly, including “Firstly” twice and “As result, a result.” The conclusion introduces a contrast but does not clearly resolve it. Group related points together, use one clear topic sentence per paragraph, and make references such as “they” unambiguous.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to education and employment, including “post graduate,” “university enrollment,” “job sectors” and “traditional high school education.” These choices show an effort to discuss the topic beyond very basic terms. However, the range is limited and many spelling, word-form and collocation errors make parts of the message difficult to understand, such as “high company are requirements,” “make new some gaject” and “show theroy people.” Several expressions are also imprecise, including “small company requirement for high educate people.” Build a reliable set of topic vocabulary and check spelling and natural word combinations. Prefer clear, accurate phrasing over ambitious expressions whose meaning is uncertain.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, including a contrast introduced by “but” and a reason clause beginning “because.” However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles and verb forms frequently make the meaning hard to follow. For example, “many people continuing their study … has increased study” lacks a clear grammatical structure, while “Many university and colleges has also grow” has problems with number and verb form. The sentence beginning “For example, goole and crime rates website” is also difficult to parse. Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses. Check singular and plural subjects, verb forms, and sentence boundaries before using longer structures.

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