Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs.

Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, a growing number of people are prioritise their work as the most important thing in their lives, while some individuals enjoy their hobbies and leisure interests more than their works. I firmly believe that, life is a long run journey so it should be enjoyed as a journey. However work is the crucial part of our life, unconditionally work is never be a good approach. This essay will elaborate both perspectives before reaching a conclusion that a balanced approach is the most beneficial.

On the one hand, people who are so dedicated, hardworking and ambisous about their work, it always the people who have a huge responsibility in their family. Most of the time, a responsibility change a person to be more hardworking because they have to feed their families. For example, a person who comes from a poor beground can not even study, from their childhood, they have to manage the finance ability, have to buy foods for family and medicines for parants. As a result, they become more focused on their work. Moreover, for a family , it is more impactful or important to income money and take the responsibility.

On the other hand, people who enjoy their lives is also a good aproach because it makes them relaxed and give a break from their daily works. Furthermore , sometimes fulfiling hobbies or enjoying leisure times can make people happy and boost their inner health. For example, when a long period of work create pressure on them, hobbies or enjoying any other things make them happy and reduce tension. As a result, they can feel more powergetic and strong mentally and physically.

In conclusion, i must say a banaced behaviour can change people's lives. And can improve inner healt.

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AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both attitudes by discussing work as a source of family responsibility and leisure as a way to relax, and your conclusion supports a balanced approach. This gives the response a relevant foundation. However, the position is not fully consistent: the introduction says work should not be the only focus, while the conclusion briefly asserts balance without explaining how people might achieve it. The work-focused argument is mainly about financial duties, and the leisure argument repeats that hobbies reduce pressure; both need fuller explanation and more specific support. The example about someone from a poor background is relevant, but its connection to prioritising work could be made clearer. Develop each side with a distinct reason and explain how it supports your view.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two attitudes, and a conclusion. The signposts “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the discussion, and examples are placed with the relevant viewpoint. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some progression. To make the flow more consistently logical, improve links between claims and explanations: for instance, the shift from family responsibility to “income money” is abrupt, and the leisure paragraph repeats the idea that hobbies make people happy without advancing it. The conclusion is also very brief and does not draw together the two arguments. Use clearer referencing and develop each paragraph through a reason, explanation, and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “responsibility,” “leisure interests,” “focused,” “pressure,” and “reduce tension.” However, the range is limited and several noticeable word-choice, collocation, word-form, and spelling errors make parts less natural or occasionally difficult to interpret. Examples include “income money,” “powergetic,” “beground,” and “works” when referring to employment. Repetition of “important,” “work,” and “happy” also limits precision. Build a bank of accurate phrases for discussing employment, family finances, and wellbeing, and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise vocabulary would help distinguish the reasons for valuing work from the benefits of leisure.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast in the opening and a conditional example beginning “when a long period of work…”. However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. For example, “a growing number of people are prioritise” combines incompatible verb forms, while “people who are so dedicated… it always the people” has a broken sentence structure and missing verb. There are also problems with agreement and articles, as in “a responsibility change a person,” and punctuation, including the comma after “However” and the fragmented final sentence. Practise forming complete clauses, checking subject–verb agreement, and using commas to separate introductory phrases.

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