Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs.

Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Some individuals are only focused on their jobs with minimum other interests while others are more passionate about their hobbies and activities outside work. Although building career is very essential, I believe giving time to hobbies and interests, one is enthusiastic about, is more important for mental wellbeing.

The people who just want to work believe that building career is most essential thing as it lays foundation for their whole life ahead. They have worked very hard to reach this place. It took them huge sacrifices to get to the position in their career so they don't want to take it forgranted. Many people don't come from a affluent background and build everything from scratch. Some have to support their families. For instance, many indiviudals break the cycle of poverty by working hard and being only focused on their goals so they think being ethusiastic about any other thing would distract them and waster their time.

On the other hand, some working people don't want to make work their whole personality. They want to have a life outside work because only working without taking part in any hobbies can be quite exhausting. Working non-stop without any break can affect your mental health. For example, many people who don't take part in any leisure activities are often more drained as a result, it effects their productivity. Furthermore, It helps them to develop skills outside work which can contribute to their personality development.

In conclusion, while career is an important part of life, I support the idea of fulfulling your passions and interests for your overall well being.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both attitudes and state a clear opinion: the introduction recognises the importance of careers, while favouring hobbies for mental wellbeing, and the conclusion returns to this view. The discussion of work-focused people is relevant, with reasons such as supporting family and escaping poverty. The leisure-focused side is also supported by points about exhaustion, mental health and productivity. This covers the task well, but development is uneven: the first side has several related reasons, whereas the benefits of hobbies are explained more briefly. The claim that leisure activities develop skills and personality is introduced but not illustrated. To strengthen the response further, explain that point with a specific example and make the comparison between the two attitudes more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response has a clear four-paragraph structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each attitude, and a conclusion. The progression is easy to follow, and signposts such as “On the other hand,” “For instance,” and “In conclusion” help readers see how the ideas relate. This is a coherent overall arrangement with a clear line of argument. Some links could be more precise, however. In “many people who don't take part in any leisure activities are often more drained as a result, it effects their productivity,” the relationship between the two clauses is not clearly punctuated, making the connection feel abrupt. Also, “Furthermore” introduces a new benefit without much development. Use clearer sentence boundaries and build each paragraph around a more deliberate sequence of claim, explanation and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “building a career,” “cycle of poverty,” “leisure activities,” “mental health,” and “productivity.” These choices communicate the main ideas, and some phrases show an attempt to express more specific concepts. However, several word-choice, collocation and spelling errors reduce precision: “make work their whole personality” is informal, “take it forgranted” is misspelled and awkward in context, and “fulfulling your passions” contains a spelling error. “Very essential” is also an imprecise combination. Aim for more natural academic phrasing and check spelling carefully; for example, use “make work their entire identity,” “take their achievements for granted,” and “pursuing personal interests.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including subordinate clauses such as “Although building career is very essential” and “because only working without taking part in any hobbies can be quite exhausting.” Most of the meaning remains clear, and the response shows some ability to connect reasons and examples within longer sentences. Some grammatical errors persist, particularly with articles, sentence boundaries and clause construction. For example, “building career is most essential thing” needs articles, while “as a result, it effects their productivity” joins two independent clauses incorrectly. The shift from “many people” to “your mental health” also makes the reference less consistent. Review article use and punctuation in longer sentences, and vary sentence structures while keeping each clause complete.

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