Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs.

Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Introduction

some peoples think that the work is much important in life than other activities

while other peoples belief that hobby is more need than work. now we discuss both point of view and adding the opinion

some people regard the work the important than the leisure activities because when the man doing the work puraparly he made the great person in the society and no need money help the other person and when the people regard the word he have no need for hobby because he have no time for hobby and he felt happy in work and they said work is most important for living the life and living in the society when the man or person doing the work he earned money when he earned money he given the good study and life to children

while the other people belief that the hobbies is much important than work because they said we do know when the life is end we should enjoy the life with friend and the family member and not the much money need for the spending life some money is enough for life that why they think that hobbies is much needed in life

i think work is most valuable in the life because man when doing the work in the life he had no need money help and man doing the much work he faces the difficult and he is ready for the society problem and he faces easy and the help the other people in difficult time. he give the good education his children .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, meeting the basic requirements of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is limited and repetitive. For instance, the argument for work-focused individuals relies heavily on the same point about earning money for children's education, which is repeated in the conclusion. The ideas lack depth and specific examples, remaining at a very general level. To improve, you should expand on the 'why' and 'how' of these attitudes, perhaps discussing the psychological benefits of hobbies or the societal impact of career-driven individuals, rather than focusing solely on financial stability.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear structure. While there is an attempt at paragraphing, the transitions between ideas are weak or non-existent. The text relies on simple conjunctions like 'and' or 'when' to link clauses, which creates a repetitive flow. There is a lack of cohesive devices (e.g., 'furthermore', 'conversely', 'in contrast') to guide the reader through the argument. The introduction is also quite informal and lacks a clear thesis statement. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would significantly enhance the logical flow of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite basic and repetitive. You frequently use words like 'work', 'people', 'life', and 'money' without much variation. There are also several errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'hobby is more need' instead of 'hobbies are more necessary' and 'puraparly' (likely meant 'properly'). The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas clearly. To reach a higher band, you should focus on learning synonyms and collocations related to work-life balance, such as 'professional fulfillment', 'recreational pursuits', 'financial security', and 'personal development'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede clarity. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'some peoples think', 'hobbies is much important'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are run-on or fragmented, lacking proper punctuation. The range of grammatical structures is very limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences. There is little evidence of complex sentence forms, and where they are attempted, they are often inaccurate. You need to focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles, before moving on to more complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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