Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs.

Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

A few people have little interest in work as the most important thing in life. Other people attach with their activities and free time rather than that of job.Us ually in my country, Pakistan people prefer job with another activity.In this eassy we are talk about the human nature how are intersted in job or free time hobby.

The man are attach with game because his interst are develop in game for example he was play cricket with the friend. The women are like to play rocket shitter reason is that they feel to have some physical activity in their daily life for instance they play with their friends in every evening to have a break from work.

People are individually linked with job; the fact is that they need money, for example, to pay their bills or house rent. The person have many responsibilities to get a job the reason being to pay attention to their daily needs, for instance, like getting home groceries.

In my opinion, both have the same advantages; jobs are important for wealth and hobbies are used to reduce stress. for example people are used to full duty job four days and on the weekend to play games and perform many other activities.

In this essay, we have to talk about the importance of jobs and activities to know the range of people to be having interest in them.The mostly man are have the knowledge of bo

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While the essay attempts to address both attitudes regarding work and leisure, the arguments are superficial and lack depth. The introduction is unclear, and the conclusion is incomplete and abruptly ends mid-sentence. The ideas presented, such as the mention of cricket or grocery shopping, are not sufficiently extended or linked to the broader prompt. Furthermore, the position is not clearly maintained throughout the essay. To improve, you must ensure you meet the word count and provide more substantial, well-reasoned arguments for each perspective.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear logical progression. While there is an attempt at paragraphing, the transitions between ideas are mechanical and often confusing. For example, the shift from discussing gender-based hobbies to financial responsibilities is abrupt and lacks a cohesive link. The use of cohesive devices is very limited and often inaccurate, such as the repetitive use of 'for example' and 'for instance' to start sentences. The lack of a proper conclusion and the incomplete final sentence further disrupt the flow of the text, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, which limits the ability to convey complex ideas. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'attach with their activities' instead of 'attach importance to' or 'engage in', and 'rocket shitter' which is unclear. The range of vocabulary is insufficient for an academic task, relying heavily on simple, everyday language. To achieve a higher band, you should focus on learning topic-specific collocations and synonyms to avoid repetition and improve the precision of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'The man are attach' and 'The women are like'. Sentence structures are predominantly simple, and attempts at more complex sentences are often marred by errors in syntax and punctuation. Articles are frequently misused or omitted, and there are several instances of non-standard phrasing that make the text difficult to parse. Significant improvement in basic sentence construction and proofreading for grammatical accuracy is required.

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