Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-08-24
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs.
Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
While some people believe that their job is very essential and they gave lesser attention to other activities, others develop joy in their hobby and leisure activities. Although both views have some merits, i believe one's career field should occupy majority of their life. My essay will discuss both views and give my opinion.
On the one hand, Some people derive complete joy from leisure activities rather than their job because they do not derive satisfaction from their job. Firstly, the reason why some prefer to enjoy life outside their work is because they lack job satisfaction. This means some workers perform a single activity everyday so they may feel bored and discouraged. As a result they tends to derive pressure elsewhere. For instance, a clerk who performs registration of data everyday may feel bored about her job.
On the other hand, I completely agree with people who prioritize their career because they often led to fulfilment and self achievement. In other word, there people have a positive attitude towards their job because it is their passion, So they usually upgrade their skills and insight. For instance, a doctor who love to save life will always put his patient and job first.
Inconclusion, although placing individual happiness ahead of one's profession have some benefits, putting career first have much more benefit because it brings sense of self actualization and fulfilment.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the essay fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. The arguments provided, such as the clerk example or the doctor example, are quite brief and lack the depth required for a higher band score. To improve, you should expand on your reasoning with more detailed explanations and perhaps a second example for each perspective to ensure a more thorough exploration of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use basic cohesive devices like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' to signal shifts in the argument. However, the transitions between sentences are sometimes mechanical, and the overall structure feels a bit sparse due to the limited length. To improve, try to use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence followed by well-developed supporting points.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on simple phrasing such as 'very essential' and 'derive complete joy'. There are also some minor word choice issues, such as 'there people' instead of 'these people'. To improve, aim to incorporate more sophisticated collocations and topic-specific vocabulary related to career development and work-life balance, such as 'professional fulfillment' or 'intrinsic motivation'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
There is a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. You have several grammatical errors, such as 'they gave lesser attention' (tense inconsistency), 'they tends to derive' (subject-verb agreement), and 'placing individual happiness... have' (subject-verb agreement). These errors occur frequently enough to cause some minor distraction. To improve, focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and consistent verb tenses, and try to incorporate more complex sentence structures with greater accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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