Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs.

Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is believed that some individuals gives more attention in their jobs instead of hobbies while other argue that hobbies are more crucial rather than intrests on jobs. In this essay, I provide reasons and explanations of these statements with my preferences.

On the one hand, doing jobs make individuals life better and provides lots of benefits. The first advantage is that, jobs secure life of people because it fulfill their requirements and generates good quality of lifes in upcoming days. Another benefits is that, work boost communication skills and make people confident. For example, if people do jobs then he/she face lots of difficulties while communicating with their clients or customers which improve their skills and confidence level.Therefore, employment make people independent and creates numerous facilities in their lives.

On the other hand, hobbies change the behaviour of human. This is because while returning from office or work people feel stress and tried so, when they engage with their hobbies then it makes them feel good and relax. In addition, hobbies like travelling, listening music and cooking keep individuals more active in their both professional and personal lives. For example, if workers work in office and at free time they participate in various activities, like in sports, travelling and cooking then it improves their daily live. Thus, hobbies provides lots of benefical impact in people lives. It make individuals remove from mental stress or triedness.

In conclusion, jobs and hobbies are significant in daily lives. Jobs make individuals independent and confident however, hobbies make people more active and relief from stress. The combination of work and hobbies develop better quality life of individuals.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the importance of work and hobbies, and it clearly states a personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. However, the development of ideas remains somewhat limited and repetitive. For instance, the arguments regarding how jobs secure life and build communication skills are stated but lack extended, specific examples beyond a generic mention of clients. Similarly, the discussion on hobbies focuses heavily on stress relief without introducing deeper societal or economic perspectives. Consequently, some ideas appear under-developed, keeping the task response at this level. To reach a higher standard, the writer needs to extend arguments with more specific details, fully flesh out both sides of the prompt, and ensure every point is thoroughly explained.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with clear paragraphing, dividing the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion logically. Each main idea is introduced in a separate paragraph. However, cohesion relies on somewhat mechanical and repetitive devices, such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'Another benefits is that'. Referencing is also occasionally unclear or imprecise, such as when pronouns like 'it' or 'they' refer back to plural concepts ambiguously. While the logical flow between sentences is generally maintained, the transition markers lack variety and sophistication. To improve cohesion further, the writer should use a wider variety of cohesive devices more flexibly, ensure smooth referencing throughout, and integrate ideas more naturally without relying on formulaic transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is minimally adequate for the task, demonstrating an attempt to incorporate less common words such as 'independent', 'communication skills', and 'professional'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and word forms throughout the text. Examples include errors like 'gives more attention in' instead of 'to', 'quality of lifes', 'tried' instead of 'tired', and 'benefical impact'. These lexical errors and awkward collocations occur frequently and occasionally cause some difficulty for the reader. To achieve a higher band, the student must expand their vocabulary range, pay closer attention to correct word forms and derivations, and use precise collocations naturally suited to academic writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay displays a limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple sentences alongside basic attempts at complex clauses. When the writer attempts complex structures, frequent grammatical errors occur, including subject-verb agreement issues ('individuals gives', 'hobbies provides', 'It make'), incorrect prepositional usage, and awkward pluralisation. For example, phrases like 'doing jobs make individuals life better' contain multiple errors in a single sentence. Punctuation and articles also show frequent lapses. Although the meaning is generally communicated despite these errors, the high frequency of grammatical mistakes prevents the writing from achieving higher levels. To progress, the writer needs to improve control over basic sentence mechanics, master subject-verb agreement, and reduce frequent errors in tense and plurals.

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