Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs.

Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In the modern era, different people have different point of views. Every person in the society have a right to spend his life according to its own rules. By following this some persons in the society have the opinnion that we should give the most of our intension to our work. we should have very little intrest in other things. But some people think that indiviuals should be more enthusiastic and about their hobbies and leisure intrests than their jobs.

In the further paragraphs, we will discuss it extremly and we aslo share our own ideas, knowledge and experience and support our argument with examples and relevant evidence.

To being with, we will discuss the idea of some people who regards work as the most important thing in life and they think that we should have less interests in anything else. I will not support this idealogy, according to my knowledge and experince people who follow this this type of routiene they become mental patient soon. One of my close friends, who believe and follow this idealogy,

was become a mental patient, from that day I start to not accept this theory for our social life.

Furtheremore, people who think that thay should be more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure intrests than their jobs. I will highly appriciate their thinking and point of view, because people should have interst in thier hobbies. They should work but don't ignore their hobbis in life.

According to my own knowledge and experience, people should take careoof their hobbies and should not not give too attention to job.

To sum up, we have discussed both pionts and we comes to result that we should not sacrifice our life just for job, we also should emjoy our lives and should fulfill our all wishes.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both attitudes and make your preference clear: you reject prioritising work above everything and support maintaining hobbies. However, the discussion is only partial and the ideas remain under-developed. The claim that people who focus on work “become mental patient soon” is a broad assertion, supported only by one friend’s experience, rather than a developed explanation or relevant evidence. The second attitude is also described briefly, without explaining why some people value work so highly or exploring the benefits of leisure in detail. The conclusion repeats your position but does not add support. To strengthen the response, explain both viewpoints more fully and use specific, balanced examples to justify your opinion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two attitudes, and a conclusion. Basic signposting such as “To sum up” helps the reader identify the ending. However, progression is limited: the introduction promises a discussion and evidence, while the body gives little explanation, and the first body paragraph shifts abruptly from a general claim to a friend’s experience. Linking phrases such as “To being with” and “Furtheremore” are used mechanically and do not always create a clear relationship between ideas. Some references are also unclear, including “this idealogy” and “this theory.” Organise each body paragraph around one main point, then explain and illustrate it before moving to the next.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “enthusiastic,” “hobbies,” “leisure interests,” and “sacrifice,” so the main subject is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several words or phrases are repeated, particularly “people,” “interests,” and “life.” Frequent spelling errors—such as “opinnion,” “intrest,” “experince,” and “appriciate”—make the writing less fluent and can distract the reader. Some choices are also imprecise or unnatural, for example “give the most of our intension to our work” and “mental patient.” Build a more accurate range of topic vocabulary and check spelling carefully; choose natural collocations such as “devote most of our attention to work” and “experience mental health problems.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including a relative clause in “One of my close friends, who believe and follow this idealogy…”. However, control is weak: errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction occur frequently and sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “Every person in the society have” should use a singular verb, while “was become a mental patient” has an incorrect verb form. The sentence beginning “In the further paragraphs” is also awkwardly constructed, and the final sentence contains “we comes” and “should emjoy.” Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then add subordinate clauses, checking subject–verb agreement and verb forms in each sentence.

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