Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs.

Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In recent years, work has become a widely discussed issue. While some people believe that working is the most important thing of life , others argue that hobbies are better or more evidance. This essay will examine the main arguments and present my opinion.

On the one hand, some people believe that work is the key of succesfull life and career. This is mainly because when a man face a hard situation in life he can handle it easaly specially when he had experience from working and it becames not a big problem at all with sallaire. For example,today's jobs littelrly helps peopls in their own lifes,as mecanique it more essier for fixing the problems of the car,or in the house inside like doing the hard works with essiest ways. As a result, they argue that this can have a positive impact on individuals and society.

On the other hand, others argue that hobbies its more intersant than work. The main reason is that they chossing hobbies is for their happines and flexibilty of living. For instance, swiming or running is more helpful for people to be healthy and possitive,specially when a guy in good mood he can do whatever he can ,maybe making money is a part of it. Therefore, they believe that this approach may be more beneficial in certain situations.

In conclusion, although both views have their own advantages, I believe that in our generation work is more important and helpfull because we are in the tech time and no place for no working people. Ultimately, the best approach is to consider the possible effects on both individuals and society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You discuss both attitudes and state a clear preference for work in the conclusion, so the response addresses the main parts of the prompt. However, the position is not fully established in the introduction, which says only that the essay will present an opinion, and the supporting ideas remain limited. The work paragraph focuses on practical skills, such as a mechanic fixing a car, but does not explain why work itself should be central to life. The hobbies paragraph mentions health and mood, yet these points are not developed with a clear example or explanation. Your final claim that there is “no place for no working people” is also broad and unsupported. Develop each side with a reason, explanation, and relevant example, and make your own view clear from the outset.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the discussion. However, progression within the body paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow because ideas are joined without clear relationships. For example, the work paragraph moves from handling hard situations to a mechanic repairing a car, then to a general claim about society. The hobbies paragraph similarly shifts from happiness and flexibility to health, mood, and possibly making money. Some linking phrases, such as “As a result” and “Therefore,” announce conclusions that have not been fully established. Organise each paragraph around one main point and use clearer explanation and referencing to connect supporting details.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “career,” “experience,” “hobbies,” “beneficial,” and “individuals and society,” and the reader can generally identify the intended topic. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make parts of the response difficult to understand, such as “evidance,” “succesfull,” “easaly,” and “intersant.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise: “the key of succesfull life,” “with sallaire,” and “hobbies its more intersant than work.” These issues reduce clarity and control. Build a bank of accurate collocations for work and leisure, and check spelling and word forms carefully. Prefer precise expressions such as “job security,” “personal fulfilment,” and “maintain physical health” where they fit your meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast clause beginning “While” and a reason clause beginning “because.” This shows some range, and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction occur frequently. For example, “when a man face” needs subject–verb agreement, while “hobbies its more intersant” does not form a correct clause. “The main reason is that they chossing hobbies is…” also combines incompatible structures. There are punctuation problems, including missing spaces after commas and inconsistent comma use. Practise building accurate sentences with one clear subject and verb, then add subordinate clauses only when the basic structure is secure.

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