Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs.

Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Many people think job as most important thing in life while some gives more priority to theirs hobbies and leisure rather than works. This essay will focu on both the aspects followed by my opinion.

To begin with, there are several reason to support work is most important in life. It help to earn money and gives people finincial freedom. To explain it, If people think job as most important in life they will focuse on their jobs which will help them to earn money because employer have to pay their employes because they have done theri jobs by which their compney will genterat profit and they will get paid and by which they can earn money and get finincial freedom in their life. To be specifi, if some one is doing job the company or a employers of the company have to pay their employe for their job because they are working theri and doing companyes work to get paid or earn money.

On the other hand, their are some people in the world who give priority to their hobbies and leisure rather than jobs due some ideas that has its merits. It help peopel to understand life and how to enjoy it, To add more, the peole who focuse

in theri hobbies and leisure interests are usuelly sems to be more happy and joyful rather than who gives impotance to job because they are doing what they like to what they love to do and it help them to make their life more joyful and enjoyable.

To conclude, work helps people to earn money and gives them finincial freedom where as hobbies and leisure interest give them ment peace and make their life more enjoyable and joyful. Regarding my opinion i strongle belive that giving priority to hobbies and leisure interests are more appeling in life because work gives finincial freedom whereas its gives life freedom.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both attitudes: the first body paragraph links work with earning money and financial independence, while the second says hobbies can bring happiness and enjoyment. Your conclusion also gives a clear preference for leisure, so the reader can identify your overall view. However, the discussion is only partially developed. The explanation of work repeats that employees are paid for doing company work, rather than exploring why someone might make work central to life. The benefits of hobbies are also stated generally, without a specific example or fuller explanation. Develop each side with distinct reasons and supporting examples, and make your opinion more precise—for instance, explain how to balance financial security with personal fulfilment.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two attitudes, and a conclusion. Transitions such as “To begin with,” “On the other hand,” and “To conclude” help signal the stages of the discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is limited: the first body paragraph circles back several times to the same point about earning money, and the second moves quickly from hobbies to happiness without developing the link. Some connections are also awkward, such as “To add more” and “Regarding my opinion.” Organise each paragraph around a clear main idea, then add an explanation and example; use linking phrases only where they express the relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use a small set of relevant terms, including “financial freedom,” “hobbies,” “leisure interests,” and “enjoyable,” which makes the general topic clear. However, vocabulary is limited and repetitive, particularly in the repeated references to money, jobs, and happiness. Several word-choice and spelling errors also make the writing less clear, including “focuse,” “finincial,” “ment peace,” and “appeling.” Some phrases are unnatural, such as “give priority to theirs hobbies” and “life freedom.” Build a more accurate range of topic vocabulary and check spelling and collocations. For example, you could use “work-centred lifestyle,” “personal fulfilment,” and “financial independence” where appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including a conditional structure beginning “If people think job as most important in life…” and a contrast in the conclusion. However, control is inconsistent, and several long sentences become difficult to follow because clauses are joined without clear grammatical structure. There are recurring errors in articles, agreement, and sentence construction: “job as most important thing” needs articles, “It help” should agree with its subject, and “their are” uses the wrong form of “there.” The sentence beginning “To add more” also runs into a comma splice. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and article use, and break long explanations into shorter sentences with clear clause boundaries.

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