Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs.

Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, most of people spend their time in office and work and they are less involved in other entertainment activities, while other people are more passionable in their hobbies and spare activities. I strongly believe that people must enjoy their life in different activities and they should creat balance in work and social life. In this essay I will discuss both views and give my opinion.

Firstly, most of people spend their time and allocate their all energy to works because they want professional growth and financial securities. They want better careers growth, power and to support their family. For instance, spending most of their time solely in careers performance because it gives them a sense of personal achievements, respect at workforce and support family.But spend most of time at office can lead to some drawbacks such as they experience strees and burnout due to less social activities.

On the other hand, some people spend thir time in hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs. These peole believe that making money and careers is not only important for life, but they think that spending time in travelling, sports and with friend and family and arts hobbies brings more happines. For instance, people who spend more time in leisure activities can reduse pressure of workplace and recharge afte a busy day. Moreover, an extream focus on hobbies and other activities can bring negative effect. If some person neglects their professions they may feel stress in long term.

In conclusion, both attitudes have their own pros and cons. Although, hard work is very important in life to get financial stability but we also need social conection to unwind after a long busy day. Therefore, people should balance in their life activities both in work life and social activities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both attitudes and state a clear view: “people must enjoy their life in different activities” and “should balance” work and social life. Relevant reasons are given, including career growth, financial security, family support, and the restorative value of hobbies. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For example, the first body paragraph mentions professional achievement and then burnout, but does not show how people who prioritise work weigh these costs. The claim that neglecting a profession through hobbies may cause long-term stress is also unclear and would benefit from a specific explanation or example. Develop each side more evenly and make the reasoning behind your own position more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each attitude, and a conclusion. “Firstly,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” make the main stages easy to follow, and the ideas generally progress from reasons to consequences. This meets the lower-band expectations securely and shows some features of stronger organisation. However, links within paragraphs can feel mechanical, and some references are unclear—for instance, “But spend most of time at office” does not connect smoothly to the preceding sentence. The conclusion also repeats the balance idea without adding a final implication. Use clearer sentence-to-sentence links and organise each body paragraph around a more deliberate sequence of claim, explanation, and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “financial securities,” “professional growth,” “burnout,” “leisure interests,” and “recharge.” These choices show an attempt to discuss work and recreation beyond very basic terms. However, inaccurate word forms, spelling, and collocations are noticeable and sometimes make the phrasing awkward: “passionable,” “careers growth,” “happines,” and “reduce pressure of workplace.” Some expressions are also imprecise, such as “respect at workforce” and “social activities” where a more specific phrase would help. Build accuracy by learning common word partnerships and checking spelling and word forms; this will make your ideas clearer and more natural without requiring unnecessarily advanced vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast introduced by “while,” a reason clause with “because,” and a conditional sentence beginning “If some person…”. The overall meaning is usually understandable, but some grammatical errors remain. Examples include “most of people” and “their all energy,” where determiner order or article use is incorrect, and “people should balance in their life activities,” which has an incomplete grammatical pattern. Sentence boundaries and punctuation also need attention, as in “support family.But spend…”. Practise accurate noun phrases, subject–verb patterns, and complete sentence construction, then proofread punctuation. More reliable control of these structures would make your varied sentences easier to read.

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