Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Complete Catalyst · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs.

Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Work is important to survive in contemporary econoomy. However, some individual regard work as a crucial thing in life, while other resident are more desirable about their hobbies and recreation interests than their jobs. this essay will discuss both views and give own perspective. no security, more responsibility, passion, escape the matrix, centre of attention, social person.

On the one hand, work plays a vital key role in individuals life but some citizen take their work seriously due to more responsibilty and no security plan. they have a responsibility of their family on their shoulder and they want to fullfill their family needs and dreams. For instance, if any medical emergency occur in family and without security of finances they will not able to cure that issue and will always blame themselves for that. Moreover, they also have to pay monthly fix bills to make sure their family does suffer any trouble. By having this many burderns they feel that if they work more it will be beneficial in career prospects and they will get promotion and be there for their family.

On the other hand, some individuals give priority to their hobbies and leisure interests because they have that passion and fire to prove they can achieve certain level using their interests to escape the matrix. On top of that, they are scoial person and love to be centre of attention thay way they can build they networking to be in favour in future.

To sum up, i think it depends on individual goal in life what they want to achieve either family oriented or be a famous person. However, they both have to work hard in both ways so it does not matter which path they choose

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both attitudes and give a personal view, so the response is relevant to the task. The first body paragraph explains why family responsibilities and financial insecurity can make work a priority, with a medical emergency as an example. However, the second attitude is less fully explained: the claims about passion, escaping “the matrix,” and wanting attention do not clearly show why leisure matters more than employment, and they are not supported with a specific example. Your conclusion says the choice depends on individual goals, but it does not clearly state which attitude you consider more convincing or explain the basis for that view. Develop both sides more evenly and make your own position explicit throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting opposing views, and a conclusion. “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “To sum up” help signal the stages of the discussion. Within the first body paragraph, the sequence from family responsibilities to bills and career prospects is generally understandable. However, the opening list—“no security, more responsibility, passion, escape the matrix”—interrupts the introduction and does not connect clearly to the essay’s argument. Some links between ideas are also unclear, particularly the move from leisure interests to being a “social person” and building a network. Use complete, connected paragraphs and make each supporting point’s relationship to the main idea explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “financial” security, “medical emergency,” “career prospects,” and “leisure interests.” These choices show some range beyond basic terms. However, noticeable word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems sometimes make the meaning less clear: “more desirable about their hobbies” is not a natural way to express enthusiasm, “vital key role” is redundant, and “monthly fix bills” is inaccurate. “Escape the matrix” is informal and unclear in this academic discussion, while “centre of attention” does not precisely explain the value of hobbies. Aim for accurate, natural combinations and a consistent academic tone; check spelling and word forms, and choose vocabulary that directly expresses your intended point.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional example beginning “if any medical emergency occur” and a sentence explaining how work may lead to promotion. However, control is uneven, and errors in agreement, articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries can make the reader pause. For example, “some individual regard” needs plural agreement, and “they will not able to cure that issue” is missing a verb form. The introduction also contains sentence fragments and starts “this essay” and “no security” without appropriate capitalisation or integration. Practise building complete sentences with accurate subject–verb agreement and verb forms, and use punctuation to separate complete ideas. This will make your arguments easier to follow.

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