Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it can be seen that the employment in the Retail as well as Healthcare sector was rising day by day. Whereas, people were showing less interest in Agriculturer sector.

In 1960, just 2.5 million people were involved in the healthcare sector and then jobs in this sector gradually started rising making it the most popular empoyment at nearly 16 millions in 2020. In the starting period of 1960 nearly 6 millions of people were doing agriculture, then graph started falling down at nearly 3.75 million, it stayed constant in between year 1980 and 2000 then again started falling down, most like people were not interestes in this job sector.

Retail sector was not popular in the 1960 but started rising suddenly from 6 millions jobs in 1960 to 16 millions in 2020. Manufacturing sector was most popular sector among the other four, in 1960 jobs stands at 15 millions and the started rising to 20 million in 1980 then started falling down nearly to 13.75 million in 2020

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main overall directions: retail and healthcare rise, agriculture declines, and manufacturing peaks before falling. You also include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing at 15 million in 1960 and 20 million in 1980. However, some data are inaccurate: healthcare begins at 2 million, not 2.5 million, and agriculture is about 3 million in 1980 and 2000, rather than 3.75 million. The claim that retail rose “suddenly” is not well supported by the steady increase shown. The overview is also weakened by interpreting the agricultural decline as people showing less interest, which the graph does not establish. More precise comparisons and a clearer summary of the leading sectors would strengthen the report.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and paragraphs describing the sectors. Grouping healthcare with agriculture and then discussing retail and manufacturing gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes awkward: the agriculture account shifts from its figures to speculation about why the trend occurred, while the retail and manufacturing details are joined in one long final paragraph. Linking is also mechanical or unclear in places, particularly “Whereas” at the start of a sentence and “then” repeated across the report. Use clearer transitions to compare trends and separate information into more balanced paragraphs; this would make the organisation easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant chart vocabulary, including “sector,” “employment,” “rising,” “falling” and “constant,” so the main trends are generally understandable. However, several choices are imprecise or unnatural for describing data. “Rising day by day” does not suit a graph with four widely spaced years, and “most popular employment” suggests preference rather than the number of jobs. Phrases such as “started falling down” and “jobs stands at” are also awkward, while “Agriculturer,” “empoyment” and “interestes” show spelling or word-form problems. Aim for precise reporting language and accurate collocations; this will make your descriptions more natural without requiring unnecessarily complex vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a time sequence with “then” and a contrast between sectors. The overall meaning is usually clear, but some errors in sentence structure, agreement and articles remain. For example, “the employment in the Retail as well as Healthcare sector was rising” has awkward agreement and article use, and “in 1960 jobs stands at 15 millions” shifts tense and does not form a complete, accurate clause. The sentence beginning “Whereas” is also a fragment, and the final sentence lacks clear punctuation between its linked ideas. Keep past-tense reporting consistent and check subject–verb agreement, sentence boundaries and plural forms when revising.

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