Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-06
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph below provide the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US form 1960 and 2020.
Overall, it is clear that the graph of manufacturing rises in beginning and fell in 2020. In addition, Agriculture begin to decline from 1980.Whereas, Healthcare graph changes dramatically and reatil graph also substantatly increases.
In 1960, the largest number of jobs in US economy was manufacturing which provided job for 15 million. In contrast, Healthcare contributed lowest job approximately 3 million in 1960 followed by retail and agriculture around 6 millions. In 1980, manufacturing contributed job opportunities for 20 million people which is the highest of all
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You identify several relevant features, including manufacturing’s rise to a peak and subsequent decline, agriculture’s overall fall, and growth in retail and healthcare. You also compare the sectors in 1960 and give the manufacturing figure for 1980. However, the response is incomplete: it stops before describing the later years, so the major changes and the 2020 comparison are missing. The overview is also imprecise; healthcare and retail both reach about 16 million by 2020, while agriculture falls to about 2 million. The response contains 96 words, below the required 150, which limits how fully you can report and compare the data. Develop the overview and cover the main trends across the full period.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
There is a basic structure: an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph beginning with details from 1960 and 1980. Time markers such as “In 1960” and “In 1980” help the reader follow the data. However, the response ends abruptly after the 1980 manufacturing figure, so there is no clear progression through 2000 and 2020 or concluding comparison. The overview’s ideas are crowded together, and “Whereas” does not connect smoothly to the preceding sentence. Organise the details in a consistent chronological sequence, use complete paragraphs, and connect comparisons explicitly—for example, contrast manufacturing’s decline after 1980 with the continued growth of retail and healthcare.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “contributed,” “decline,” “largest,” and “approximately,” and you attempt to describe trends rather than simply list figures. However, the range is limited and several word choices or spellings reduce precision: “graph of manufacturing” is less suitable than naming the number of jobs in manufacturing, while “retail graph” and “healthcare graph” are awkward. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “form,” “reatil,” and “substantatly.” Use accurate sector names and collocations such as “employment in manufacturing,” “the number of jobs,” and “rose steadily.” Check spelling carefully, especially for key terms that carry the main comparisons.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response includes simple statements and an attempt at a more complex comparison, such as “In contrast, Healthcare contributed…,” but the range of sentence structures is limited and errors recur. For example, “The graph below provide” has subject–verb disagreement, and “manufacturing rises in beginning and fell in 2020” mixes verb forms and uses an unclear time expression. In “Agriculture begin to decline from 1980,” the verb form is incorrect, and the sentence beginning “Whereas” is not joined to a main clause. Articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries also need attention, as in “provided job” and the unfinished final sentence. Practise accurate past-tense descriptions and complete sentences before adding more complex comparisons.
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