Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

This graph is a pictorial representation of an intesting facts about jobs , it ilustrates that number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the us since 1960 to 2020 so in earlier times healthcare was no considered an essencial aspect of life so thats real cause behind 1960s low graph line but gradually as the time changes as year pass through so individuals thought keep revolutionized so thats the key point and in 1980s health care was raised than older times and it keep reamaning high as times passes, we entered mordern era . as we saw agrigulture line on graph so we find that its going bad now a days so in 1960s era agriculture was at its peak and as years passes so in 1980,2000,2020, so in these years agriculture keep on falling per year so its very low now. If we move to another sector so we know that we in 1980 retail was no much organized so cause it was not too much on its peak but as time changed so useage and graph lines according to years keep on changing and but since 2000 it was very high and in twenty years only retail only increases only a bit. Now final one its manufacturing sector which is a intresting and it is now very low so it was on its peak in 1980s but not in mordern eras now its since 1980 in instead of raiseing its keep decreasing.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify all four sectors and report several broad trends, including agriculture’s decline and manufacturing’s peak in 1980 followed by a fall. However, the response only partially fulfils the task because it gives little precise, comparative reporting and lacks a clear, data-based overview. Some claims are inaccurate: agriculture was not at its peak in 1960, since it fell from about 6 million jobs to 3 million by 1980; healthcare rose steadily rather than becoming high in 1980; and manufacturing was not “very low” in 2020, at about 13 million. Explanations about changing attitudes and modern life are not shown by the graph. Focus on the main trends and support them with accurate figures and comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response covers the sectors in a recognisable sequence, using phrases such as “If we move to another sector” and “Now final one” to signal transitions. This gives some organisation, but the ideas are mostly presented as one long, loosely connected passage rather than in clearly developed paragraphs. Linking expressions such as “so” and “as time changed” are repeated, and some connections are unclear, for example “individuals thought keep revolutionized.” The discussion also shifts between describing the graph and speculating about causes, which interrupts progression. Group the information into an overview and focused comparisons, and use clear links to show how the trends relate.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “sector,” “agriculture,” “manufacturing,” “peak,” and “decreasing,” so the reader can identify the general subject. However, the range is limited and several expressions are imprecise or unnatural, such as “pictorial representation of an interesting facts,” “healthcare was no considered,” and “retail was no much organized.” Frequent spelling errors—including “intesting,” “essencial,” “agrigulture,” and “mordern”—also reduce clarity and control. For this task, prioritise accurate trend language and neutral descriptions rather than unsupported explanations. Practise collocations such as “the number of jobs rose” and “employment declined,” and check spelling before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt longer sentences with time clauses and comparisons, but these are often difficult to follow because of frequent errors in sentence structure, verb forms, articles, and punctuation. For example, “as the time changes as year pass through” has an unclear clause structure, while “it keep remaining high as times passes” has problems with subject–verb agreement and tense. Several sentences run together without full stops, making relationships between ideas harder to understand. There are also some simpler constructions that communicate the intended trend, such as “it was on its peak in 1980s.” Build accuracy first with short sentences using past-tense verbs, then combine them with controlled clauses such as “while” or “whereas.”

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