Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-06
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrates the four categories of jobs in the USA
Overall, jobs like retail and agriculture shows the upward trends in the line graph. However jobs like healthcare and manufacturing decline the trends overs the years among all of them.
Healthcare significantly increases nearly 0 to approximtely 15 millions from 1960 to 2020.In instance retail sector also showed positive trends which nearly 5 millions to approximately 15 millions from year 1960 to 2020.These are two sectors of jobs which grew significantly by the time
On the other side of the graph, the agriculture sector decline nearly 5 million to almost 0 from 1960 to 2020. The manufacturing sector
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5
You identify several relevant trends, including growth in healthcare and retail and a decline in agriculture, but the overview misstates the graph: manufacturing does not decline throughout; it rises to about 20 million in 1980 before falling to 13 million. Healthcare starts at about 2 million, not near zero, and reaches roughly 16 million, while agriculture ends at about 2 million rather than almost zero. The manufacturing paragraph is unfinished, and there is no clear comparison of the sectors’ positions by 2020. The response also falls short of the required minimum length, leaving key features and figures under-reported. To improve, give an accurate overview and support it with the main turning points and end values.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response has a basic structure: an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs describing rising and falling sectors. Phrases such as “Overall” and “On the other side” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, progression is limited because the overview groups manufacturing with healthcare as declining, then the body describes healthcare as rising. The final paragraph stops after “The manufacturing sector,” so the account feels incomplete and the comparison is not developed. Some linking is also repetitive, particularly the repeated use of “sector” and “trends.” Organise the body around clear comparisons, and ensure each paragraph contains complete, logically connected information.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some relevant vocabulary for describing charts, including “illustrates,” “increases,” “decline,” and “positive trends,” so the topic is generally clear. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or repetitive: “categories of jobs” is less precise than “employment sectors,” and “showed positive trends” is vague when describing a numerical rise. There are also spelling errors, including “approximtely,” and the phrase “decline the trends” is not natural English. Use a wider set of precise trend verbs and check spelling and collocations. For example, distinguish between a sector that “rose,” “fell,” or “remained stable,” rather than relying on general phrases such as “positive trends.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response includes simple statements and attempts a more complex contrast with “However,” but the range of sentence structures is limited, and errors occur in basic agreement and sentence construction. In “jobs like retail and agriculture shows,” the plural subject requires “show”; “manufacturing decline the trends” also has an incorrect verb pattern. The sentence beginning “In instance retail sector” lacks appropriate grammatical framing, and the run-on spacing after “2020” makes the sentence boundary unclear. The final fragment, “The manufacturing sector,” is incomplete. Practise forming complete sentences with accurate subject–verb agreement, articles, and punctuation, then combine related comparisons using controlled clauses.
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