Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, in the USA the number of jobs in two sectors Retail and Healthcare sharply increased in the time. whereas, other two sectors Manufacturing in addition Agriculture significantally decreased.

To begin, the number of Retail stood at 6 millions in 1960. after that the number of employes rose significantally to 15 millions in 2000 also, it increased minimally 16 millions in 2020. whereas, Healthcare sector jobs was 2 millions in 1960, after that rose to 5 millions in 1980. in addition number of jobs climbed rapidly approximately 16 millions.

In contrast, number of manufacturing jobs was 15 millions in 1960 after that it was peacked point 20 millions in the year 1980. then the number of jobs decreased sharply around 13 millions in 2020. while, Agriculture jobs were 6 millions in 1960. after that decreased 1980 in adittion the number of jobs was levelled of between 1980 and 2000 after that jobs were declined approximately 2 millions in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You cover all four sectors and identify the main contrasts: retail and healthcare rise, while manufacturing and agriculture decline overall. Several figures are accurately reported, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million in 1980 and agriculture’s broadly stable level from 1980 to 2000. However, some trends are incomplete or imprecise. For healthcare, you give the 1960 and 1980 figures and the final level, but omit the important rise to about 11 million in 2000. The overview also says manufacturing and agriculture “significantly” decreased, although manufacturing first rose substantially and agriculture’s decline is more gradual. Include the key intermediate values and describe each sector’s overall pattern more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall shape: an introduction, an overview, and separate paragraphs comparing rising and declining sectors. This makes the information generally easy to follow. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes weakened by mechanical or unclear linking, especially repeated “after that,” “in addition,” and “whereas.” For example, the healthcare figures are presented without the 2000 stage, and “after that decreased 1980” makes the sequence difficult to interpret. Some sentence boundaries are also unclear, as in “in the time. whereas” and “in 2020. while.” Use fewer, more precise transitions and organise each sector’s figures in chronological order, with clear sentence boundaries.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of trend vocabulary, including “increased,” “climbed rapidly,” “decreased,” and “levelled off,” and the main meaning is usually understandable. However, several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems reduce precision: “the number of jobs … sharply increased in the time” is awkward, “peacked point” is not a natural expression, and “significantally” and “employes” are misspelled. “Increased minimally” is also less natural than “rose slightly.” Aim for accurate, conventional language for describing charts, such as “reached a peak,” “remained stable,” and “declined gradually.” Check spelling and use “jobs” or “employment” consistently rather than switching to less suitable forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, and the chronological comparisons are generally understandable. However, some errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and punctuation remain. For example, “the number of jobs in two sectors Retail and Healthcare sharply increased” needs clearer punctuation and a more natural structure, while “Healthcare sector jobs was 2 millions” has a subject–verb agreement error and an incorrect plural construction. Several full stops divide clauses awkwardly, as in “in the time. whereas,” and some sentences join multiple stages without clear punctuation. Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement and singular/plural forms. More accurate control of these structures would make your comparisons easier to read.

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