Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrate number of jobs in different four sectors of the economy in United States America, between 1960 to 2020 and jobs in millions.

Overview, manufacturing have more jobs in the past but its drops significently in recent few years, however healthcare sector have lowest jobs in earlys but its increased frequantly in last few years.

To begin with, manufacturing sector have highest numbers of jobs in 1960 compare to others, jobs are increased frequently but after some years its drop again and loose around quadrant of their overall jobs. Agriculture sector have 5 millions jobs in 1960 and its decreased significantly, and drops around half of their overall jobs.

Moreover, healthcare sector starts from the lowest jobs around at 2 to half and increased over the years and become the most develped sector in form of jobs increased up 5 times than in the past, last sector is retail that contains around 6 millions jobs in 1960, it's increased over the years around at 4 times and become the second highest sector in the form of jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main contrast: manufacturing begins as the largest sector and declines after its peak, while healthcare rises from the lowest starting point. You also note the growth in retail and the fall in agriculture, so the response addresses the key trends. Several details, however, are inaccurate or too vague: agriculture is about 6 million jobs in 1960, not 5 million, and manufacturing peaks at about 20 million in 1980 before falling to 13 million in 2020. The claim that manufacturing loses “around quadrant” of its jobs is unclear, and the overview does not state that retail and healthcare both reach about 16 million by 2020. This captures much of the chart, but more precise comparisons and clearer support are needed for a fuller account.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs. The sequence from manufacturing and agriculture to healthcare and retail is generally understandable, and linking phrases such as “To begin with” and “Moreover” help signal movement between points. However, the organisation within paragraphs is sometimes loose: the manufacturing and agriculture trends are combined without a clear comparison, while the final paragraph shifts from healthcare to retail in one long sentence. Some references, such as “its” and “their,” are not always clear, and repeated use of “sector” and “jobs” makes the progression feel mechanical. Grouping the two rising sectors together and the two declining sectors together would make comparisons easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant chart vocabulary, including “increased,” “decreased,” “lowest,” and “highest,” and the reader can generally understand the trends you intend to describe. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning unclear. For example, “increased frequently” does not naturally describe a steady rise, “loose around quadrant” is not an appropriate way to express a proportion, and “most developed sector in form of jobs” is unclear. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “significently,” “frequantly,” and “develped.” Aim for precise trend language and check spelling; this will make your comparisons more natural and reliable.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, control of basic sentence grammar is inconsistent. The opening says “The line graph illustrate,” where the singular subject requires a singular verb, and “manufacturing have” similarly needs agreement. Articles and prepositions are often missing or awkward, as in “in United States America” and “increased up 5 times.” Some sentences also contain unclear clause structures, particularly the long final sentence linking healthcare and retail. Use a wider range of sentence patterns, but keep each comparison in a clearly controlled sentence; check subject–verb agreement, articles and verb forms during revision.

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