Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-09
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph illustrate the information about number of jobs in different categories in US between 1960 to 2020. in year 1960 almost 2 million jobs in healthcare and 5 million jobs for agriculture, a slightly 5 million plus in retail and 15 million peak jobs category is manufacturing. according to the chart manufacturing jobs are at lead from start reached at their peak in 1980 the 20 millon jobs the higest amount of jobs in all categories till now.and overall not too much decline but there is a less curve with time.in comparison to agriculture have seen less jobs overall. for healthcare jobs a growing trend with time is showing. so the amount of jobs overall increase with time in particular category.for retail an overall increase with time showing in amount of jobs. the highiest range of grow in retails is at 2020 with the value of 15 million plus. So total number of jobs are higher for manufacturing and healthcare and retail jobs are increasing with time. at last agriculture jobs are lesser and amost maintaing a decline around 2 million.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You identify several important patterns: manufacturing peaks in 1980, healthcare rises over time, and agriculture declines overall. These are relevant features, and the opening figures for healthcare and manufacturing are broadly accurate. However, some data are misreported: agriculture is about 6 million in 1960, not 5 million, and retail reaches about 16 million in 2020, rather than merely “15 million plus.” The overview is also unclear when it says total jobs “increase with time,” since this is not true of every sector and no overall total is established. Develop the comparisons more precisely—for example, retail and healthcare both finish at around 16 million, while manufacturing falls after its peak and agriculture remains the smallest sector.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The response moves through the four sectors and includes some comparison language, such as “in comparison” and “for healthcare,” so the reader can identify the general subject of each point. However, the ideas are presented as one continuous sequence rather than in clearly organised paragraphs, and the progression is difficult to follow. Several points are repeated, particularly that healthcare and retail increase over time, while links such as “so” and “at last” do not always show a clear logical relationship. Group the information into an introduction, a concise overview, and detail paragraphs that compare related trends. Use clear references to the years and sectors so each sentence builds on the previous one.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “peak,” “decline,” “growing trend,” and “value,” which helps communicate the main patterns. However, the range is limited and several expressions are imprecise or unnatural, such as “at lead,” “less curve,” and “highest range of grow.” Repetition of “jobs,” “overall,” and “with time” also makes the description less precise. Choose standard terms for describing data and use them accurately: for example, say that a sector “peaked at” a figure, “declined gradually,” or “rose steadily.” Check spelling and word forms, including “million,” “highest,” “maintaining,” and “growth,” as these errors reduce clarity.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, and the general meaning is usually recoverable. However, sentence structure and control are inconsistent. The opening, “The graph illustrate the information,” has subject–verb disagreement, while “in year 1960 almost 2 million jobs in healthcare” is a fragment without a main verb. Other examples, such as “for healthcare jobs a growing trend with time is showing,” have awkward word order and missing grammatical elements. Capitalisation and punctuation are also unreliable, including the lowercase “in” after the first full stop and run-on sentences. Practise complete subject–verb sentences and use a controlled mix of simple and complex forms, checking agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries.
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