Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line graph indicates the information about the number of employment opportunities in US economy in four sectors during the time period of 1960 and 2020.

Overall,both healthcare and retail had the highest jobs in millions during those 60 years.Agriculture faced the lowest number of jobs at over that period,but manufacturing had the peak but went down after some years.

According to the graph,the manufacturing sector recorded the highest number of jobs, with over 20 million between 1960 and 1980,but the job opportunities went down in the year of 1980 to 2020 over 7 millions of job opportunities were lost.Both retail and healthcare escalated over 16 millions of jobs throughout the six decades,but healthcare was the lowest at the begining it evntually raised the career opportunities from 2 to 16 million.And for the retail it was at the medium but evetually the job opportunities dropped,for the six decades it was constantly at the lowest point under 5 millions of job vacancies.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify several relevant broad patterns, including manufacturing’s early peak, agriculture’s low figures, and growth in healthcare and retail. However, the overview is not consistently accurate: retail and healthcare did not both have the highest employment throughout the period, and retail did not drop overall. It rose from about 6 million to 16 million. The account also misstates manufacturing as having “over 20 million” jobs; it reached about 20 million in 1980, then fell to 13 million by 2020. The final sentence incorrectly says retail stayed below 5 million, apparently confusing it with agriculture. These errors and the limited coverage of the four series make the summary only partially successful. Compare the start and end values more carefully and give a precise overview of the main changes.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic progression from an introduction to an overview and then details, and phrases such as “Overall” and “According to the graph” help signal these stages. However, the overview and detail paragraph do not build a clear, reliable comparison: the final sentence shifts back to retail after discussing healthcare and gives a trend that conflicts with the earlier account. Several ideas are joined into long sentences with repeated “and,” making relationships between trends difficult to follow. Organise the details by meaningful contrasts—for example, manufacturing and agriculture declining after their respective points, versus retail and healthcare rising—and use separate sentences to keep each comparison clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary, including “recorded,” “escalated,” “peak,” and “job opportunities,” and the reader can generally identify the sectors being discussed. However, several choices are imprecise or unnatural for describing chart data. “Employment opportunities” and “job vacancies” do not accurately represent the number of jobs shown, while “escalated” suggests a more dramatic rise than the graph establishes. Repetition of “job opportunities” also limits range, and spelling errors such as “begining” and “evetually” reduce accuracy. Use standard data-reporting terms consistently, such as “employment,” “the number of jobs,” “rose,” “fell,” and “remained stable,” and check spelling before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of sentence forms, including a complex sentence beginning “According to the graph,” and the main meaning is usually recoverable. However, control is uneven in longer sentences, particularly where several clauses are joined without clear punctuation: “over 7 millions of job opportunities were lost” is attached awkwardly to the preceding clause. There are also errors in articles, prepositions, and sentence construction, as in “during the time period of 1960 and 2020” and “at over that period.” Missing spaces after commas and inconsistent punctuation further affect readability. Aim for shorter, complete sentences, and check that each clause has a clear subject and verb and that time expressions are formed accurately.

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