Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

This line graph illustrates 4 different sectors for creating employment opportunity in the economy of the USA from 1960 to 2020.

Overall job market from these 4 industry fluctuated over the time. But manufacturing industry provided huge opportunity and stood highest in the year 1980 which is nearly 20 million. But this and agriculture industrys contribution decreased gradually. Retail and medical area has promosing contribution and stood same in the year 2020.

In the year 1960, maufacturing industry were highest among them which is 15 million. That increased drastically but lowered over next 60 years. Similarly, agriculture insudtry also declined over the tenure.

On the otherhand, retail and healthcare industry provided limited opportunity in 1960 but that changed drastically over the period and these two industry remained highest in the year 2020 which is 15 million. These two industry outperformed

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing peaks in 1980 and then declines, agriculture falls, while retail and healthcare rise. However, some comparisons are inaccurate or unclear. In 2020, retail and healthcare are both about 16 million, not 15 million, and manufacturing is still substantial at about 13 million; saying the two rising sectors “remained highest” overlooks that they only tie for the lead. The overview also says manufacturing and agriculture contributions decreased “gradually,” although manufacturing first rose and then fell. The response is 140 words, below the required 150, and several trends receive little detail. Add accurate figures at key points and explain the contrasting trajectories more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs comparing the sectors. Grouping manufacturing with agriculture and then retail with healthcare gives the reader a basic route through the data. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and the final sentence, “These two industry outperformed,” is unfinished, leaving the comparison incomplete. Linking phrases such as “Similarly” and “On the other hand” help, but the latter introduces a contrast without clearly specifying what is being contrasted. Some references, including “this” in “But this and agriculture,” are also unclear. Complete the final point and use more precise links between each sector’s figures and its trend.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “fluctuated,” “declined,” “contribution,” and “outperformed,” and the reader can generally understand which sectors you mean. However, the range is limited by repeated use of “industry” and “opportunity,” and several expressions are not natural for describing employment data. For example, “provided huge opportunity” and “limited opportunity” are less precise than saying a sector employed a certain number of people or had a particular employment level. There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, such as “maufacturing,” “insudtry,” and “promosing.” Use accurate sector names and varied terms such as “employment,” “job numbers,” and “workforce” to make comparisons clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including the contrast in “But manufacturing industry provided…” and the comparison beginning “On the other hand.” However, grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes make relationships difficult to follow. Examples include “Overall job market from these 4 industry fluctuated,” where articles and plural agreement are missing, and “manufacturing industry were highest,” where the verb does not agree with the singular subject. “These two industry remained highest” also needs a plural noun and clearer sentence construction. The final clause is incomplete. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles, and plural forms, then check that every sentence has a complete main clause.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.