Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the information about the amount of jobs in four various sectors ( manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare )of economy in the united states over a 60 years time period from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, we can easily see that health care and retail was slightly increased while agriculture and manufacturing were decreased after a point .

on the one hand, looking at the figure in detail the number of jobs in manufacturing sector accounted for 15 million in 1960 this figure highest at 20 million in 1980 after that jobs in manufacturing sector were decline until 2020. the number of jobs in retail sector stood at 6 million in 1960 . this figure increased by 17 million until 2000.

on the other hand , we can explain different level of jobs in healthcare and agriculture sector .the number of jobs in agriculture sector were 6 million in 1960 while this figure decreased throughout the time period . the number of jobs in health care sector were gradually high over the time period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and give a relevant overview, noting that healthcare and retail rise while agriculture and manufacturing fall after reaching a high point. You also report manufacturing’s 15 million jobs in 1960 and peak of 20 million in 1980, and agriculture’s decline from 6 million. However, several key details are missing or inaccurate: retail reaches 15 million in 2000, not 17 million, and then rises slightly to 16 million; manufacturing falls to 13 million by 2020. The overview also oversimplifies the trends: retail rises throughout, while healthcare grows markedly from 2 to 16 million and ends level with retail. Include these endpoint comparisons and describe the main changes more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic, relevant structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs grouping the sectors. The phrases “on the one hand” and “on the other hand” signal the shift between groups, so the reader can follow the general organisation. However, progression within the detail paragraphs is uneven: manufacturing and retail are discussed together, but the retail account stops at 2000, while the second paragraph gives few figures for either sector. Some linking phrases feel mechanical, and punctuation and spacing make transitions less smooth. Organise each detail paragraph around clear comparisons across the same years, and use concise links such as “By contrast” or “Meanwhile” only where they clarify relationships.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic vocabulary to communicate the main subject, including “line graph,” “sector,” “increased,” and “decreased.” There are also attempts at more formal reporting language, such as “accounted for” and “stood at.” However, several choices are awkward or imprecise: “amount of jobs” is less suitable than “number of jobs,” “four various sectors” is redundant, and “this figure increased by 17 million” incorrectly suggests an increase of that amount rather than a total. Repetition of “the number of jobs” and “this figure” also limits flexibility. Choose precise trend verbs and collocations, and vary references to the data without sacrificing accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses linked with “while” and “after that,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, errors in agreement, tense, articles, and sentence boundaries are frequent enough to make the writing less controlled. For example, “health care and retail was” should use a plural verb, and “jobs in manufacturing sector were decline” has an incorrect verb form. The opening also needs clearer article and preposition patterns, while several sentences begin with lowercase letters or run together after full stops. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and subject–verb agreement, and check each sentence for a complete clause and correct punctuation.

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