Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrate the information about the number of jobs in four different Sectors of the US economy from 1962 to 2020.

A glance at the graphs reveal that number of jobs in health care department and retail department are increased in the initial year and climbed between 1960 and 2020, while jobs in other department like manufacturing and retail sectors are decline with the passage of time.

As regard the US sectors, the number started in manufacturing department at 15 in 1960, jobs rapidly increased from 1960 to 1980, after the 1980 instantly declined the jobs at until 2020, while in agriculture department in 1960 jobs dropped gradually at, Before the fluctuation, the number of jobs remained at the same level between 1980 and 2000, and after the twenty year jobs declined in slowly.

However. In healthcare department the number started at 2 in 1960, number of jobs rapidly increased between 1960 and 2020, while retail department started at 6 in 1960 , from 1960 to 2000 healthcare jobs increased as a fast rate and after the 2000 jobs gradually increased.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad direction of several series and include relevant figures, such as manufacturing at 15 million in 1960 and healthcare at 2 million. However, the overview is unclear and contains a key contradiction: it says manufacturing and retail declined, although retail rose from 6 to 16 million. The report also misses the important comparison that retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million by 2020, while agriculture was the smallest sector. Some details are inaccurate or too vague: manufacturing peaked at 20 million in 1980 before falling, and agriculture declined from 6 to 2 million, with a plateau from 1980 to 2000. A clearer overview and more accurate comparisons would make the main features easier to understand.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic structure, moving from an introduction and overview to descriptions of the sectors, and the reader can generally identify which lines are being discussed. However, progression is difficult to follow because ideas are crowded into long, loosely connected sentences. For example, the manufacturing and agriculture trends are combined in one sentence, while the final paragraph shifts between healthcare and retail without clearly separating their changes. Linking phrases such as “while” and “after” are repeated, and some transitions do not express the intended relationship clearly. Organise the report into a concise overview followed by logically grouped comparisons, and use clearer sentence boundaries and references to guide the reader.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “increased,” “declined,” “remained at the same level,” and “fluctuation.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the trends hard to interpret. “Number of jobs … are increased” is not a natural way to describe a rise, and “jobs rapidly increased” confuses the jobs with the number of jobs. “In the initial year” is also unclear when describing a period. Repeated use of “department” is unsuitable for these economic sectors, and “instantly declined” does not accurately describe a gradual fall. Choose precise trend verbs and standard terms such as “sector” and “employment,” and check collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt longer sentences with clauses linked by “while,” “after,” and “before,” but these structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some relationships unclear. For instance, “The line graph illustrate” has subject–verb disagreement, while “A glance at the graphs reveal” has the same problem. Tense and sentence construction are also inconsistent in “after the 1980 instantly declined the jobs at until 2020.” Several sentences run together or contain incomplete punctuation, including the opening overview and the final paragraph. Use a consistent past tense for the historical data, check singular/plural agreement, and divide each sector’s trend into complete, controlled sentences before attempting more complex combinations.

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