Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The given line graph illustrates that information about the number of jobs in four sectors pf the economy and the city of us from 1960 and 2020.
Overall, it can be seen that the number of jobs sectors in manuacturing increased steadily over the period, In addition, agriculture sector was lowest at the end of the time span.
Initially, in 1960 manufacturing was the highest proportion in the us economy it has marginally grow at 20 millions in 1980, after the trend thie rate significantly decline at 13 millions in 2020. Moreover, in retail and healthcare sectors played a crutial role in the us economy, retail has has only 6 millions and healthcare has only3 millions which is the lowest proportion in this graph, after that these propotion dramatically go up at 16 millions between 1960 and 2020. On the other hand, in 1960 ariculture sectore has only 6 millions proportion and this rate slightly drop over the year in 1980 to 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You identify several relevant features, including manufacturing’s peak in 1980 and agriculture’s low position by 2020. However, the overview is inaccurate: manufacturing did not increase steadily across the period; it rose to 20 million and then fell to 13 million. The report also gives incorrect starting figures for healthcare (2 million, not 3 million) and says retail and healthcare both rose to 16 million, although retail was already at 15 million in 2000 and reached about 16 million in 2020. The agriculture trend is only broadly described, and important comparisons are underdeveloped. To improve, give a precise overview of the contrasting trends and report the main figures accurately across the four years.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response has a basic paragraph structure, with an overview followed by details, and it uses some linking expressions such as “Overall,” “Moreover,” and “On the other hand.” These help signal relationships between points. However, progression within the detail paragraph is difficult to follow: manufacturing, retail, healthcare, and agriculture are combined in long sentences, and the phrase “after that” does not clearly identify which sector or period it refers to. Some connections are also inaccurate or awkward, so the reader must work to understand the comparisons. Organise the body into clearer groups—for example, manufacturing and agriculture, then retail and healthcare—and use explicit time references to make each trend easy to track.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “line graph,” “sector,” “proportion,” “decline,” and “drop,” and you attempt to describe change rather than simply list figures. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “number of jobs sectors,” “highest proportion,” and “played a crucial role” when describing employment figures. Spelling errors, including “manuacturing,” “thie,” “crutial,” and “ariculture,” are noticeable and can make the report harder to read. Aim for precise, conventional language for charts, such as “employment in manufacturing,” “the highest number of jobs,” and “rose/fell to.” Check spelling carefully before submitting.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, but complex structures are often faulty and errors occur frequently. For example, “manufacturing was the highest proportion … it has marginally grow” joins clauses without suitable punctuation and shifts tense; “in retail and healthcare sectors played” has an incomplete grammatical structure; and “retail has has only 6 millions” contains repetition and incorrect number agreement. Articles and sentence boundaries are also inconsistent. These problems sometimes make the intended comparisons difficult to follow. Use past simple consistently for the historical data, check subject–verb agreement and singular/plural forms, and build shorter, complete sentences before attempting longer comparisons.
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