Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.0)

the line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of us economy from 1960 to 2020.

overall the manufacting was on the higest point in the beginning years and retail and health care had a steady rose . while the agriculture faces the fall in the start

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You identify the graph’s subject and mention several relevant trends: manufacturing starts at the highest level, retail and healthcare rise, and agriculture falls initially. However, the response is far too brief to summarise the main features adequately, and the overview is incomplete: it does not report that manufacturing peaks in 1980 and then declines, or that retail and healthcare reach about 16 million jobs by 2020. The statement that retail and healthcare had a “steady rose” also misses their different starting points and rates of growth. The response contains 41 words, so it does not meet the 150-word minimum; 8 words copied from the prompt were excluded from that count. Add a fuller overview and key comparisons across the period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic sequence: it introduces the graph and then gives an overall statement, with “overall” signalling a shift to the summary. This provides a simple, recognisable structure. However, the ideas are compressed into one short paragraph, and the relationship between the trends is not clearly developed. The phrase “while the agriculture faces the fall in the start” is attached to the other trends without a clear explanation of how it contrasts with them. To improve progression, use separate introduction and overview paragraphs, then organise details by related trends—for example, the rising sectors together and manufacturing and agriculture together. Clear links between sentences would make the comparison easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “line graph,” “number of jobs,” “sectors,” and “agriculture,” so the reader can identify the subject. The range is nevertheless very limited, and some word choices or forms make the summary less clear. “Steady rose” is not a natural expression for an upward trend; use “rose steadily” or “increased.” “Highest point” is understandable but less precise than “highest level” when describing job numbers. There are also spelling errors in “manufacting” and “higest,” and “US economy” needs a more complete phrase such as “the US economy.” Build a small range of accurate trend verbs and comparison phrases, and check spelling before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts a compound sentence to connect contrasting trends, using “while,” and the main message remains partly understandable. However, the sentence structure is limited, and errors in articles, agreement, and verb forms affect accuracy. In “the manufacting was on the higest point,” the article and construction are awkward; a clearer pattern is “manufacturing was at its highest level.” “Retail and health care had a steady rose” combines an unsuitable verb form with a noun phrase; write “retail and healthcare rose steadily.” The final clause, “the agriculture faces the fall in the start,” also has an unnecessary article and an unclear tense pattern. Practise accurate past-tense sentences and vary them with simple comparisons, checking punctuation and sentence boundaries.

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