Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates, the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. There are total four sectors which are manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare.

Overall, the highest number of jobs is in the manufacturing sector and the least numbers of jobs are in the agriculture.

It is evident that in 1960 the total number of jobs in maufacturing are 15 millions and they show increase in rate till 1980 which goes to 20 million which is highest in number and then shows tremblous decrrase in rate till 2020. We can also see that in retail sector the job demand is increasing overall in given period they were 7 millions in 1960 and 17 million in 2020.

However, we can also see that the retail and healthcare closely foloowed each other in 2020, and both show regular increasing in job in given time. The agriculture sector show decreasing in rate of jobs they were 6 million in 1960 and show some decrease till 1980 and remain constant till 2000 and they again shows decrease in rate and the jobs remain approximately 2.5 millions in the year 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify all four sectors and describe several key trends, including manufacturing peaking in 1980 and agriculture declining overall. However, the overview is not fully accurate: manufacturing is not the highest sector throughout the period, since retail and healthcare both reach about 16 million jobs in 2020, compared with roughly 13 million in manufacturing. The claim that retail and healthcare “closely followed each other in 2020” is also imprecise, as they finish at approximately the same level. Some figures are inaccurate: retail is about 6 million in 1960 and 16 million in 2020, rather than 7 and 17. To strengthen the response, give a clearer overview of the changing rankings and compare the major rises and falls accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs describing sector trends. This gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, progression is weakened by repetition and by grouping trends in a way that is not always clear. For example, retail is discussed in one paragraph and then revisited alongside healthcare in the next, while the overview’s claim about the highest and lowest sectors is not clearly reconciled with the final figures. Linking phrases such as “It is evident,” “We can also see,” and “However” are repeated or do not always signal a meaningful contrast. Organise the details into clearer comparisons—for example, rising sectors together and declining sectors together—and use references and transitions that show how each point relates to the previous one.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “increase,” “decrease,” “remain constant,” and “overall,” so the main information is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes parts of the report awkward. Phrases such as “show tremblous decrease in rate,” “job demand is increasing,” and “regular increasing in job” are not natural ways to describe the number of jobs shown. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “maufacturing,” “decrrase,” and “foloowed.” Aim for precise chart language such as “employment rose,” “the figure declined,” and “the number of jobs remained stable.” Proofreading spelling and choosing standard trend collocations would make the description clearer and more appropriate for an academic report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses joined with “and,” “which,” and “however,” and the reader can usually follow the intended trends. However, errors in sentence structure, agreement, and verb forms occur repeatedly. For example, “the number of jobs … are 15 millions” has a singular subject with a plural verb, and “they were 7 millions” uses an incorrect plural form after a number. In “the agriculture sector show decreasing,” the verb does not agree with its subject; later, “they again shows” also has inconsistent agreement. The opening comma after “illustrates” is unnecessary, and some long sentences run together without clear punctuation. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and subject–verb agreement, and divide longer descriptions into controlled sentences.

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