Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Graph below illustrate the jobs number in four diffrent sectors, Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare in the US economy from year 1960 to 2020. So the graph demonstrate number of jobs in millions and year are sperated in 4 diffrent years 1960,1980,2000 and 2020.

The highest number of jobs were in manufcaturing but as the years pases the number of jobs fall and in the other hand the lowest job number was in Healthcare but as the year pases it rose, same for reatil as well, However the minimum number of jobs was in agriculture and as year pased the number drops more and it is now the lowest job among four job sectors.

In conclusion the overview job sectors Healthcare and Retail are been rising as per the predicting to graph as year passes and it's seems that Heathcare would rose more in future and tackle number of jobs in Retail. Manufacturing and Agriculture are been decreasing as the year passes.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and describe the broad contrast between rising healthcare and retail employment and declining agriculture. However, the report is only partly developed: it gives no figures and omits key comparisons, such as manufacturing peaking at about 20 million in 1980 before falling to 13 million, while retail and healthcare both reach roughly 16 million by 2020. The claim that manufacturing had the highest number throughout is inaccurate, since retail and healthcare catch up with it by the end. The final prediction that healthcare will overtake retail is not supported by the graph, which ends in 2020. Focus the overview on the main changes shown and support it with selected figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph describing trends, and a concluding overview. This gives the reader a basic route through the information, and phrases such as “as the years passes” signal change over time. However, the progression is not always clear because the second paragraph combines several comparisons in a long sentence, and the conclusion repeats earlier points rather than adding a clear summary. Connectors such as “in the other hand” and “However” do not clearly express the relationships between the ideas that follow them. Organise the body by contrasting the rising sectors with the declining ones, and use shorter sentences with clear references to each sector.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “sectors,” “jobs,” “number,” and “rising” and “decreasing,” so the general subject is understandable. However, the range is limited and several phrases are unnatural or imprecise, such as “jobs number,” “the lowest job number,” and “tackle number of jobs.” Repetition of “as the year passes” also limits flexibility. Spelling errors, including “diffrent,” “manufcaturing,” “reatil,” and “Heathcare,” are noticeable and reduce the accuracy of the report. Build a more precise set of expressions for describing quantities and trends, and check spelling carefully. For example, use “number of jobs,” “employment fell,” and “employment rose steadily” in place of less natural wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both simple and more extended sentences, including clauses linked with “but” and “as,” but control is limited and errors occur frequently. For example, “Graph below illustrate” lacks an article and has incorrect subject–verb agreement; “the number of jobs fall” uses the wrong verb form; and “Healthcare and Retail are been rising” has an incorrect verb construction. The sentence beginning “In conclusion the overview” is also difficult to follow because its clauses are joined without clear grammatical structure or punctuation. These errors sometimes make relationships between ideas unclear. Practise accurate past-tense descriptions of the completed period, subject–verb agreement, and sentence boundaries before attempting longer sentences.

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