Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph demonstrates the number of employments across four sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, retail and healthcare sector's employment rate increased substantially over the period of time while jobs were reduced in agriculture zone gradually.

Healthcare jobs starts between 0 and 5 million while reatail jobs were at little above 5 million in 1960, subsequently increased about 5 million each in 1980. Healthcare jobe rose dramatically and get little above 10 million and retail's employments reached to 15 million in 2000. Then both were stops at above 15 million by the end of 2020.

In contrast, agriculture experienced continuous decline in employment rate by starting from just above 5 million and reached to around 4 million in 1980 then it was almost stable till 2000 then again drops to 2 million by the end of 2020. Similary, Manufacturing had a dramatic increased in jobs and started above all other sectors from 15 million to 20 million in 1980, but then experienced significant drop to between 10 and 15 million by the end of 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main overall contrast: retail and healthcare rise, while agriculture declines, and you also report manufacturing’s peak and subsequent fall. The key figures are generally grounded in the graph, including manufacturing at about 20 million in 1980 and agriculture ending near 2 million. The overview is present, but it omits the important comparison that retail and healthcare both finish at roughly 16 million, becoming the joint highest sectors. Some details are also imprecise: agriculture is about 3 million in both 1980 and 2000, rather than around 4 million in 1980, and manufacturing ends near 13 million. This covers the task well overall, though some comparisons and details need fuller, more precise reporting.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response has a clear four-part progression: an introduction, an overview, a paragraph on the rising sectors, and a contrast paragraph covering agriculture and manufacturing. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “In contrast,” and “Similarly” help readers follow the comparisons, and the information is mostly grouped logically. The sequence within the rising-sectors paragraph also moves chronologically from 1960 to 2020. To make the progression more controlled, ensure each comparison is expressed clearly: “Then both were stops at above 15 million” is difficult to interpret, and the final paragraph combines two contrasting trends without a clear transition between them. More precise referencing and sentence boundaries would make the cohesion smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant task vocabulary, including “increased substantially,” “continuous decline,” “dramatic,” and “significant drop,” showing an attempt to describe trends rather than simply list figures. However, several word choices and collocations are unnatural or inaccurate, such as “number of employments,” “employment rate” for job totals, “agriculture zone,” and “jobs were reduced.” Spelling slips in “reatail,” “jobe,” and “Similary” also detract from accuracy. Some trend language is repeated, and “dramatic” is used for manufacturing’s rise where a neutral description would be more precise. Aim for standard chart-reporting phrases and check spelling carefully; this would make the vocabulary more natural and precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a time sequence with “while” and a contrast introduced by “In contrast.” The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but some errors in verb forms, agreement, and sentence construction reduce accuracy. For example, “Healthcare jobs starts” should use a plural verb, while “both were stops” has an incorrect verb form. “Manufacturing had a dramatic increased” also uses the wrong grammatical form after “had.” The long sentence beginning “Healthcare jobs starts…” contains several clauses that would be clearer if separated or punctuated more carefully. Work on consistent past-tense reporting and subject–verb agreement while retaining your attempts at varied sentence structures.

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