Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-07-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates information about the number of jobs in four different sectors that contribute in the economy of the United States from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, healthcare experienced a significant upward trend for economy, while agriculture witnessed a steady decline throughout the period.

To begin with, the number for healthcare jobs stood at 3 million in 1960, which had experienced a sharp rose after 1980 and reached at 16 million in 2020. Subsequently, retail sector, which had the highest figure, experienced steady growth throughout the period, which had started at 6 million in 1960 and ended up at 16 million in 2020.

On the other hand, although manufacturing sector had 15 million economy in 1960, it was decline after 1980 and reached at 12 million in 2020, before reached at peak with 20 million in 1980. Moreover, agriculture sector started at 6 million economy, it experienced a downward trend and reached its lowest point with 2 million at the end of the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends, such as the growth in healthcare and the decline in agriculture. However, the reporting of data is occasionally inaccurate or confusing. For example, stating that the manufacturing sector had '15 million economy' is imprecise, as the graph measures the number of jobs, not the economy itself. Additionally, the description of the manufacturing peak is slightly muddled in its phrasing. While the main features are highlighted, the analysis could be more precise in its comparison of the data points to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Subsequently', and 'On the other hand' are used to guide the reader. However, the flow within sentences is sometimes hindered by awkward phrasing, such as 'which had experienced a sharp rose'. While the overall progression is clear, the mechanical nature of some transitions and occasional referencing issues prevent a higher score.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to describe trends (e.g., 'significant upward trend', 'steady decline', 'sharp rose'). However, there are noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as using 'economy' incorrectly to refer to the number of jobs (e.g., '15 million economy'). The phrase 'sharp rose' is also incorrect; 'sharp rise' would be the appropriate noun form. These errors do not impede communication but indicate a limited range of precise terminology.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with verb tenses and word forms. Examples include 'it was decline after 1980' (should be 'it declined') and 'before reached at peak' (should be 'before reaching a peak'). The misuse of prepositions and inconsistent tense usage (e.g., 'which had experienced') detract from the accuracy of the writing. While the meaning remains clear, the frequency of these errors limits the score.

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