Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-07-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 7.0)

The graph above illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the jobs in manufacturing were highest in 1960 and retail and agriculture were same in 1960 was 5 million and healthcare was recorded low.

The manufacturing was 15 million in 1960 which was highest and then increased to 20 million in 1980 and after that decreased to nearly 14 million in 2020. The next is healthcare was low around 2.5 million in 1960 and goes on increasing till 2020 and ended with 16 million.

The next is retail which was 6 million in 1960 and it was increasing at a good rate and in 2000 it was 15 million and till 2020 it was 16 million. The agriculture was also started with 6 million in 1960 and it decreased in 1980 to around 2.5 million and it goes in decreasing and till 2020 it was near to 1 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

You have successfully identified the main trends and provided data points for all four sectors. However, the overview is slightly underdeveloped. While you mention the highest and lowest points, it would be more effective to highlight the contrasting trajectories, such as the growth in healthcare and retail versus the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. The data is generally accurate, but ensure that comparisons are more explicit; for example, noting that healthcare overtook manufacturing as the leading sector by the end of the period would strengthen your analysis. Overall, you have covered the requirements of the task well.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with each sector discussed in a structured manner. You use basic cohesive devices like 'The next is' and 'after that' to move between ideas. However, the flow is somewhat mechanical, and the transition between sentences could be smoother. To improve, try using a wider variety of linking words and phrases to connect your points more naturally. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the progression of information from the overview to specific details is clear, which helps the reader follow your argument without difficulty.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You use a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe the trends, such as 'increased', 'decreased', and 'recorded low'. However, the vocabulary is somewhat repetitive, and there are minor inaccuracies in collocation, such as 'retail and agriculture were same in 1960 was 5 million'. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise academic vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', or 'remained stable'. While your current vocabulary is adequate for the task, it lacks the flexibility and precision required for higher band scores.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the manufacturing', 'the healthcare') and verb tense consistency ('agriculture was also started'). Some sentences are slightly awkward, such as 'it goes in decreasing', which impacts readability. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, they occur frequently enough to limit your score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles will significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.

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