Band 9.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 9.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 9.0)

The line graph illustrates the changes in employment figures across four economic sectors in the United States Manufacturing, Retail, Healthcare, and Agriculture from 1960 to 2020, measured in millions of jobs.

Overall, Healthcare and Retail experienced consistent upward trajectories throughout the 60-year period, with Healthcare exhibiting the most dramatic rise. Conversely, Manufacturing saw initial growth before experiencing a steady decline, while Agriculture remained the smallest employer with a slight downward drift.

In 1960, Manufacturing was by far the largest provider of jobs at 15 million, peaking at 20 million in 1980. However, this sector subsequently contracted, dropping to 17 million in 2000 and eventually falling to 13 million by 2020. In contrast, Retail started at 6 million in 1960 and climbed steadily over the decades, overtaking Manufacturing around 2015 to reach 16 million by the end of the timeframe.

Healthcare began as the smallest sector in 1960 alongside Agriculture, offering only 2 million jobs. Over the following six decades, Healthcare witnessed substantial and uninterrupted expansion, matching Manufacturing at approximately 14 million jobs in 2015 and concluding at 16 million in 2020. Conversely, Agriculture started at 6 million jobs in 1960, dipped sharply to 3 million in 1980, and then slowly diminished to finish at just under 2 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 9.0

The response is excellent. You have successfully identified all key trends, including the peak of the manufacturing sector and the steady growth of healthcare. The overview is clear and effectively captures the main features of the graph. You have made relevant comparisons, such as noting when healthcare matched manufacturing in 2015 and contrasting the trajectories of the four sectors. All parts of the prompt are addressed with a clear, logical focus on the data provided. The information is accurate and well-supported by the figures from the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.5

The essay is well-structured with a logical progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a clear focus: the introduction, the overview, and two body paragraphs detailing the specific sectors. You have used cohesive devices effectively, such as 'Conversely', 'However', and 'In contrast', to signal shifts in the data. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the information flows smoothly from one point to the next, making the report very easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 8.5

You demonstrate a strong command of vocabulary, using precise terms such as 'upward trajectories', 'contracted', 'substantial and uninterrupted expansion', and 'diminished'. The range of vocabulary is sufficient to convey the trends accurately and with a professional tone. There are no noticeable errors in word choice or collocation, and the language used is natural and appropriate for an academic report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 9.0

The grammatical control is very high. You have used a variety of complex sentence structures, such as participial phrases ('offering only 2 million jobs') and subordinate clauses, with high accuracy. Punctuation is used correctly throughout, and there are no significant errors that impede communication. The majority of your sentences are error-free, reflecting a strong command of English grammar.

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