Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The graph chat demonstrate the different job projections that participate in US economy from the year 1960 to 2020.

The overall analysis shows that retail jobs has show great potential .Whereas, the agriculture has showed less popularity in the growth of US economy.

On the onset of 1960, retail jobs anchored at little over 5 million jobs in 1960. Moreover, in 1980 jobs reached at 10 million. Furthermore, it peaked at a stagnant point of 15 million jobs in 2000.From their it showed very little growth and reached little over 15 million jobs in 2020. For health care, from the era of 1960 to 1980 the jobs jumped from 2 to 5 million. In the following 2000, the surge increased to around 11 million. An finally in 2020 it reached at 15 million jobs.

Secondly, the jobs of manufacturing reached 15 million in 1960.From there it showed little growth and anchored at 20 million. However, from there it is on constant down fall in 2000 it reached 16 million and surge remain and dropped to 12 million in 2020. For agriculture , the jobs are constantly dropping from 7 million in 1960 , 3 million in 1980, and finally dropped at 1.5 million jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers all four sectors and provides data points for the years mentioned. However, the overview is weak; it lacks a clear summary of the most significant trends, such as the overall shift from manufacturing/agriculture to service-based sectors. While the main features are identified, the reporting is somewhat mechanical, listing data points rather than synthesising the information to highlight key comparisons. To improve, ensure the overview captures the 'big picture' trends rather than just stating that one sector is popular and another is not.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often repetitive or slightly unnatural (e.g., 'On the onset of', 'From their', 'An finally'). The progression of ideas within paragraphs is sometimes disjointed, relying on a list-like approach to data rather than smooth transitions between comparisons. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that referencing is precise would help the flow of the argument significantly.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there is a lack of precision and some awkward phrasing. Phrases like 'anchored at', 'stagnant point', and 'surge remain' are used incorrectly or in contexts that do not fit the data. There is also a reliance on basic verbs like 'reached' and 'showed'. To reach a higher band, you should use more precise terminology for describing trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'plateaued', or 'experienced a downward trend', and avoid non-standard collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('retail jobs has show', 'jobs are constantly dropping'), incorrect preposition usage ('reached at'), and punctuation errors. While the meaning is generally clear, these errors are persistent and distract the reader. The sentence structures are mostly simple or compound; there is a limited attempt at complex structures, and those that are attempted often contain errors. Focusing on basic accuracy and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would improve the score.

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